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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
When one-to-one even in virtual world, I became very uncomfortable. I have few SAers in msn, but we rarely talk of anything else than SA. And about that with few words.

I would like to really get to know msn people. But how to get to know a stranger? What to talk about? How?
 

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For me its tough to keep an ongoing conversation over IM's regardless who its with. You just quickly run out of things to talk about. If you really want to get to know someone you gotta try and find common ground, well beyond the SA. Hobbies, sports, any interest that you share and can expand on. If its a new person I would just be upfront and play the 20 question game to try and keep things going. :)
 

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I find that, if it is someone I know IRL, it is very difficult for me to maintain an IM conversation with them. I have nothing to talk about because I don't do anything because of SA.

If it is an internet friend, I can usually talk to them about anything, it doesn't matter what we say to each other since we will never meet, and either one can cut off all contact with the other at the press of a button, so I can just pull topics out of thin air - current events, philosophy, politics, religion...and also with internet people you know less about them so there are more questions to ask.

If you are talking to an internet-person for the first time on MSN:

1. If they use an internet pseudonym, ask them where they got it from - they will then get around to asking you the same question, and this consumes a good couple of minutes.

2. Ask them how they are, the resulting exchange will consume a minute or so, and occasionally actually leads to a discusion all of its own.

3. Ask them how there day was/what they did - again, this question will be reflected and consume a few minutes.

4. Ask them about jobs/college/university/school/exams - the general 'career' related stuff will consume a good amount of time.

5. Discuss things you have in common - SA, Pets, Hobbies, whatever, its all good.

That advice is not supported by anything other than my own experience, but there you go, works for me :b
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
I have a lot of IRL IM friends, and I find it easy to talk to them. I know what they are into, so its not hard to find things to talk about. And I dont have the urge to maintain the conversation, the silent moments are ok.

When I'm talking to stranger, I find myself much more nervous. The fact that he/she can cut off contact completely with a single click is so intimidating. The fear of being rejected... Silent moments are personal failure.

Funny though that its almost opposite in real life for me :D
 
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