Wow! Kind of an inspirational story in a way. I mean, you recognize your *******ness and feel it is not who you are. I think that's more than a lot of *******s can say for themselves. Therefore, you are a good person. That's awesome.
I guess in a sense I can relate with the masking thing. I personally am a very conventional person, I will go tanning when I can, don't leave the house without makeup, take forever doing my hair, will talk about whatever anyone else around me is talking about even if I feel it's not the way I truly feel about the topic. I don't express my true thoughts (and when I try it comes out all wrong anyway). I'd rather stay quiet than expose my true self though, for some reason.
I think we all have our various coping strategies. I know I take on an imitative quality to blend in with my surroundings. But I think everyone has their own way. I guess we always have to be in a battle with ourselves though when dealing with our outter and inner selves.
Anyway, welcome to SAS. I hope you make some discoveries here. I think any kind of self questioning always leads to growth.
Personally, I wonder if you're really as much an ******* as you say you are. Because I know how we can all analyze ourselves in the most negative way!
I guess in a sense I can relate with the masking thing. I personally am a very conventional person, I will go tanning when I can, don't leave the house without makeup, take forever doing my hair, will talk about whatever anyone else around me is talking about even if I feel it's not the way I truly feel about the topic. I don't express my true thoughts (and when I try it comes out all wrong anyway). I'd rather stay quiet than expose my true self though, for some reason.
I think we all have our various coping strategies. I know I take on an imitative quality to blend in with my surroundings. But I think everyone has their own way. I guess we always have to be in a battle with ourselves though when dealing with our outter and inner selves.
Anyway, welcome to SAS. I hope you make some discoveries here. I think any kind of self questioning always leads to growth.
Personally, I wonder if you're really as much an ******* as you say you are. Because I know how we can all analyze ourselves in the most negative way!