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Dude
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604 Posts
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When you get sick of trying to improve and forcing yourself all the time out of your comfort zone, which you probably will, make sure you don't take too long off. Cause Crap im rusty now. I felt exhausted from forcing myself to be social, so I took a break hoping my motivation would come back again. That never happened and fear has come back. One thing I have really learned is that you can't suddenly become motivated. You have to keep working to build it up and make sure your thoughts stay positive so you do not get dragged down. Sometimes there are thoughts, only the feeling of your mind being dissarrayed. If you think hard enough, you can find what you want and what is bothering you and resolve it. Oh well setbacks happens, we got to keep pushing Saers.
 

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In hiding
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That little dude you've got as your av is so me, lol. Anyway, I know I'm only going to get worse if I keep living the way I have for the past... gee, about 4 years now! :| I've been shutting myself off from the world for so long. And yet I can never keep it up because people won't just leave me alone. I'm on centrelink payments so they're always forcing me to do courses or like right now, work for the dole. Sometimes I like that they make me go out but an even bigger part of me wishes everyone would just go away and let me be by myself for as long as I want. It's true that it does get harder though if you just avoid people for so long. My mum doesn't seem to know about SA a great deal but come the weekend, she'll expect me to come out with her (lol yeah, my weekends aren't pathetic at all given I spend them with my mother every week :sus) and if I say I don't want to, she'll say in a nagging, sing-song voice something like "it'll get harder to leave the house." Half the time I don't think she even realises there's a problem with me right now. But I mean, how couldn't there be? For all the time I've been at home, hiding away, does she really think I'm just going to be 'over' my problems?
 

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A good point you make there. It's the same with just about everything really. Eg, for me, if I don't go to the gym for more than 2 days in a row, it's so hard to go back.

Unfortunately I've never been in a habit of continually confronting my SA issues. Fighting SA is very exhausting but hopefully it will be less so eventually. You just have to put on a strong fight first.

Good post and I hope your motivation keeps building up :)
 

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Yeah I am in a cycle were im bad for the first 2 or 3 days of school. Then thursday and friday I feel invincible then I just sit my *** down on the weekends and **** around. Then when I get back to school, the cycle happen again. This upcoming weekend I am getting out of the cycle because it is clearly hindering my recovery.
 

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I agree. During term-time I did well but the holiday sent me backwards.
 

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Yea man. Like the lady said, its like gymming.

Yesterday, I got up to do some push ups .. and wow, i realized just how rusty i've become.

Its gonna take a while again to build up my strength again.

Its the fact that i realize that i've gotten back weak, that motivates me to go gym again.
 
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