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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Would you be proud of yourself for trying and failing or would you be angry at yourself? This is the problem with social anxiety. When you try something and it ends up being just as bad as you imagined it to be, you get mad at yourself for trying and promise to never do anything like it again. You have to fail sometimes in order to win so just be proud of yourself for trying!!

Theres 2 types of failure

1) failure because you didn't attempt to try
2) trying and failing

#1 is actually alot worse than #2. You fail right from the start because you didn't bother to try. When you try and fail you should be proud of yourself for trying and just accept you failed so what try again next time.

You lost to social anxiety the moment you stopped trying.

You overcome it by never giving up.

So please just face your fears.

And another word of advice take small steps at a time. If you can't start a conversation with a complete stranger then there's probably no way you can ask someone out. Start out small and build up till you reach the top. Sometimes you will sink to the bottom just accept that and keep trying. That is the key to winning and overcoming social anxiety.




In response to this topic, Name something you really wanted to do but failed because you didn't try and now you regret it.

I wanted to get the phone number of a girl in my college class that I really like but I was afraid of sounding too nervous so I didn't try and I regret it so much now.
 

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Getting hit with #2 over and over on a consistent basis is one of the reasons why I have SA in the first place.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Life goes on. As you said yourself, asking someone out and getting a "no" is better than wondering "what if". It's isn't really a failure. And look for someone who you have something in common with, not just based on appearance. Meet people by doing volunteer work, sports, hobbies etc. Much easier.
Not trying technically isn't failure either since you never tried. Failure is when you lose. But by not trying you miss out on a huge opportunity so you lose either way.

@Bob You're doing something wrong, probably taking far too big steps at once. You got to start out doing something small and be comfortable with it then build up from that.
 

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SASsy
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Dude, I've been rejected by more women than I can count. But there were a few times when I was pleasantly surprised by a "yes" answer from girls I thought I had no chance with.
 
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