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Drinking
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
What if everyone in the world never needed to talk much or judge the way society does today, and the outcasts were the ones that made noise and wouldn't shut up.
I'm sure somewhere in the world cultures would be accepting of us, but because of that, we wouldn't have SA and would be comfortable with the lifestyle.
If only the world were open minded and understood life has no rules. Society makes the rules, and we can be accepting of all!
 

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Drinking
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370 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
The more I think about it, society is the direct cause of my SA!
I need to move to another country..
Now.. where to go..
 

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Drinking
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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
But what if society accepted and understood that.
There would be no need to be afraid..

Hey I thought you were gonna come over and drink and play rock band with me!
 

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Yes, I absolutely agree with OP.

- Normality is a function of critical mass.

- Abnormality is a function of being a minority.

If enough people support something, it's "normal". There's numerous ailments, diseases, health issues ect that exist in mass numbers. But because these issues exist in vast numbers the ailments are "normal". Examples of this? Eyesight problems. There's a large enough amount of people who have near-sightedness, far-sightedness that in turn normalizes the problem. People with glasses are common. Society adapts around them because there's enough of them.

Then you have conditions that don't exist in super vast numbers but have a large enough critical mass to create a sub-culture. This sub-culture can often replace mainstream culture and in turn create a community that sustains itself, which in turn makes it feel normalized for those who have it. Examples of this? Gays, lesbians ect.

SA doesn't have critical mass.

If everyone on SAS lived in a closed off societal experiment we'd all feel normal. Since we don't have a critical mass we're stuck in other people's worlds.

Power in numbers. I think SAS help's the movement for reaching critical mass.
 

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SAS Nonmember
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I don't know, honestly. I can tell you that right now the main 'cause' of it, for me, is a fear that someone will think badly of me for any reason, and the thought that that happening would be absolutely terrible. Maybe if I lived in a society where everyone was exactly like me, or everyone was completely accepting, there would be less reason for them to think badly of me, but there would never be a guarantee that it wouldn't happen. So in that case I think it wouldn't make a difference.

On the other hand, what led to me thinking that way was, I suspect, the period I went through in middle school where I felt very very strongly that my classmates thought I was very weird and thus didn't like me. Assuming I'm right about what they were thinking, living in a more accepting society where "weirdness" wasn't seen as negative wouldn't have caused them to dislike me. Then again I have no way of knowing whether they really were thinking that or not.

Just because something is seen as normal or accepted does not mean that it's good or healthy. Bad eyesight may be normal, but it's still a physical ailment that needs to be treated. Being overweight may be normal, but it's still unhealthy and can cause disability. Having a society full of people who think in a disordered way wouldn't magically make their way of thinking correct.
 

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The more I think about it, society is the direct cause of my SA!
I need to move to another country..
Now.. where to go..
Japan no eye contact is considered respect. Thats what Im talkin about :)
 

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197 Posts
i don't think so.
if people weren't so small minded and judgemental, i would be happy.. most people don't know me, yet they still judge me.. but i guess that's human, certain people are going to be like that. :/
 

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I think the only reason I have SA is because I live too much in my own head. Why do I do that? Because I think I'm special. Because in a weird way I've convinced myself that everyone else is very interested in me and wants to know what I think, and this feels like an invasion of my personal thoughts and privacy, even though I know no one really thinks like this. If I could convince myself that most people don't notice me, or care about what I do, or would even care to judge me and talk about me or think about me at all, I don't think I would have SA. I would be able to take my life and let it out of my head once in a while into the rest of the world around me.

I think the only reason that anyone in the world judges someone else is because people put energy into thinking other people judge them. It's become such a big thing in our world. People say to not care what other people think, and it's good advice, but people need to not care for real, and not just say they don't care.

So it isn't anything society does. Society reacts with what people put energy into. I feel as if a big spotlight is on me all the time, even though I know it isn't. If I just felt like that spotlight were gone, and could convince myself of that for real, there would be no more SA.

Nothing can affect you if you don't let it.
 

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Amazing
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Interesting question. It really speaks to the whole nature vs. nurture debate. I don't want to get to philosophical, but that debate speaks to this. Think about it :)
 

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Drinking
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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
I think the only reason I have SA is because I live too much in my own head. Why do I do that? Because I think I'm special. Because in a weird way I've convinced myself that everyone else is very interested in me and wants to know what I think, and this feels like an invasion of my personal thoughts and privacy, even though I know no one really thinks like this. If I could convince myself that most people don't notice me, or care about what I do, or would even care to judge me and talk about me or think about me at all, I don't think I would have SA. I would be able to take my life and let it out of my head once in a while into the rest of the world around me.

I think the only reason that anyone in the world judges someone else is because people put energy into thinking other people judge them. It's become such a big thing in our world. People say to not care what other people think, and it's good advice, but people need to not care for real, and not just say they don't care.

So it isn't anything society does. Society reacts with what people put energy into. I feel as if a big spotlight is on me all the time, even though I know it isn't. If I just felt like that spotlight were gone, and could convince myself of that for real, there would be no more SA.

Nothing can affect you if you don't let it.
Can't disagree with that.
Well put.
 

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I definitely feel a lot of times that I'm simply not compatible with this society we live in, but would fit in in a different one. Probably not in any society that exists on this planet however. It's neither realistic nor helpful to blame your problem(s) on the society though, so I'm quite willing to admit that the problem is with me and not the society.
 

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Monster
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Yes, if people were nice, exposure therapy would probably work for me. It's much easier to take bigger risks when you see good outcomes with the smaller ones.
 

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pain helps a lot
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- Normality is a function of critical mass.

- Abnormality is a function of being a minority.

If enough people support something, it's "normal". There's numerous ailments, diseases, health issues ect that exist in mass numbers. But because these issues exist in vast numbers the ailments are "normal". Examples of this? Eyesight problems. There's a large enough amount of people who have near-sightedness, far-sightedness that in turn normalizes the problem. People with glasses are common. Society adapts around them because there's enough of them.

Then you have conditions that don't exist in super vast numbers but have a large enough critical mass to create a sub-culture. This sub-culture can often replace mainstream culture and in turn create a community that sustains itself, which in turn makes it feel normalized for those who have it. Examples of this? Gays, lesbians ect.

SA doesn't have critical mass.

If everyone on SAS lived in a closed off societal experiment we'd all feel normal. Since we don't have a critical mass we're stuck in other people's worlds.

Power in numbers. I think SAS help's the movement for reaching critical mass.
i totally agree. and i believe there are more sufferers than those that come forward (for obvious reasons, it's our nature). i recently saw someone post on this site a video that included at least 50 people who suffer from social anxiety/phobia. it gave me goosebumps. i'm pretty sure it's on you tube. if we work toward awareness, are we setting ourselves up for the naysayers who also thought global warming is a myth and the holocaust never happened...or would it bring this disorder to the forefront with the same minimal amount of stigma that goes along with generalized anxiety disorder?
questions, questions...:con
 

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In hiding
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Yes, I absolutely agree with OP.

- Normality is a function of critical mass.

- Abnormality is a function of being a minority.

If enough people support something, it's "normal". There's numerous ailments, diseases, health issues ect that exist in mass numbers. But because these issues exist in vast numbers the ailments are "normal". Examples of this? Eyesight problems. There's a large enough amount of people who have near-sightedness, far-sightedness that in turn normalizes the problem. People with glasses are common. Society adapts around them because there's enough of them.

Then you have conditions that don't exist in super vast numbers but have a large enough critical mass to create a sub-culture. This sub-culture can often replace mainstream culture and in turn create a community that sustains itself, which in turn makes it feel normalized for those who have it. Examples of this? Gays, lesbians ect.

SA doesn't have critical mass.

If everyone on SAS lived in a closed off societal experiment we'd all feel normal. Since we don't have a critical mass we're stuck in other people's worlds.

Power in numbers. I think SAS help's the movement for reaching critical mass.
Awesome post, I found myself nodding to it.
 

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I think I'd still have SA and I'd leave my house no more than I do now.
 

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Done with SA
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Depends on how it's different, I suppose.

I think I'd probably still have SA, but I'd probably leave the house more often, maybe have more friends, and have an overall better opinion of people.
 
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