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Hello!

Yesterday I went to a mental clinic to see if someone could help me cope a little better. I was nervous all morning, but I am pretty proud of myself for doing it.

I went to my general doctor some months ago and told him that I thought I had Social Anxiety Disorder and gave him my symptoms. From that point all he really did was listen and prescribe me some medicine. (Zyprexa) He told me that he really wasn't specialized in this specific set of circumstances, and recommended I go to a mental clinic.

I wanted to cry when he recommended that, it made me feel like I must be crazy. I didn't like being told that, and I decided to just try and cope with the medicine he prescribed. It definitely helped in the beginning, or so it seemed. I was pretty bad off around the time that I went to the doctor, but not to long after taking the medication, it started to lose its effect.

I quit taking the medicine for about a month and saw little to no difference.
After finishing telling my mom the whole story behind why I cut myself the second time, and something else, we decided that it would probably be best if I tried going to a mental clinic and seeing what they could do to help me.

I was worried the whole morning about going, but I'm glad I did. When I was finally seen, I talked to this lady for seemingly 10-15 minutes and after that she recommended that I try counseling. I am a bit worried about sitting in a group talking about my problems, but I hope that in the end it turns out to be a really positive experience. If any of you have been to counseling, would you mind telling me how it has worked out for you, as well as what to expect?

If I could give any of you out there advice, its this:

I realize its hard, but if you think you really need more help, try and find/accept that. In the end, your only hurting yourself, and nobody deserves that, no matter how useless or unimportant you may feel. I realize that I am not magically cured of anything, but after stressing out over going there, I am relieved and glad that I did. Its another step in the right direction. I really hope to function as well as most "normal" people do and hold a job, or even find someone to care for, and I'm sure all you will when the time is right.

Anyways, thanks for reading, and I wish you all the very best of luck in your struggles! :)
 

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Good for you for going to the clinic!:) I haven't done group counseling, but I've worked with three psychotherapists individually. The first one didn't really help me any, she was more interested in gossiping with my mom. The second one was really great, but she left for another job. The therapist I'm seeing now is excellent; I really feel like I'm making progress. The point of that little rant is that if you find you're not clicking with a therapist or group, try another one. Sometimes it's just an issue of clashing personalities. Same with psychiatrists (though I've been lucky, I've been seeing the same one for the last 9 years). The group counseling definitely sounds a little scary, but it may help you. Who knows? You may even make a friend or two:) Good luck!
 
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