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so I have it in my head for this year that I want to begin developing the skills to be able to talk to females around my age, it can start as just talking to being friends, I don't think it will happen because I lack the confidence, the motivation, and especially the skills, damn I'm 28 and I never had a female friend other than when I was a kid so I don't think that really counts since I was too young and I don't really remember much about it, should I just get this idea out of my head, the committed action is what really counts but it's just a thought in my head right now.
 

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Os1
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Some thing tells me I may know how you feel. Just how you expressed yourself tells me that you seem like a great guy. :) I lack confidence as well, but Ik that if I try good things will come out of it:) I have a feeling they will for you too. Don't stop trying there is someone out there for you. Even though it can be rough. There is always someone out there who loves you:)
Just believe:)
 

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so I have it in my head for this year that I want to begin developing the skills to be able to talk to females around my age, it can start as just talking to being friends, I don't think it will happen because I lack the confidence, the motivation, and especially the skills, damn I'm 28 and I never had a female friend other than when I was a kid so I don't think that really counts since I was too young and I don't really remember much about it, should I just get this idea out of my head, the committed action is what really counts but it's just a thought in my head right now.
See bold^

I know how you feel but you need to change your self image and start trying. I share the same problems. You will never change if you don't try. Do it and reap rewards similar to that of gold and diamonds in treasure chests which tail great stories to be told. Try and you will gain some good stories to be told. Share them with these women you plan on failing with until you succeed :yes

Have faith and believe in yourself!

I think quiting the masturbation might help in your case, just saying.
 

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I understand where you're coming from and I've gad issues speaking to girls a few years back. But here's something to think about; girls are more accepting and less judgmental than boys! Honestly, more of my friends that I would feel comfortable speaking to about sensitive subjects are girls... Just be inquisitive, you'll be amazed how easy it can be. Seriously.
 

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Your biggest fear
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tis easy just start doing it ,and most importantly don't think alot about it in the words of a video game character : "most men are so afraid of beautiful girls that, anyone who actually talks to them has an advantage! Just make it up as you go"
 

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girls are more accepting and less judgmental than boys! Honestly, more of my friends that I would feel comfortable speaking to about sensitive subjects are girls...
So true!

After high school, 50% of the girls stop being so mean.

At age 21 I started French lessons, and it turned out I was the only guy there.
There were 6 18-yo girls, that ranged from cute to very hot.
Since I was not used to talking to girls, I was terrified at first, but, since I had already paid, I couldn't just leave.

However, I realized that most girls were in fact nicer than guys, and that it was easier to me to talk to them (unlike some jocks I'd met).

If you're not a musclehead, a jock, a sports fan... I.e. if you're somewhat sensible, you're better with girls than with guys. You just need to find opportunities to talk to them and lose your fears.

Listen to them and memorize. Ask follow-up questions.

Cheers!
 

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still searching...
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Number 1 (place to meet women)

Pretend you're shopping for your sister or some other female relative and ask either the saleswoman or a female shopper her opinion on which item she likes best. Ask about simple items, such as which sweater goes best with which skirt, or if those polka dot pants really are in style. Don't push your luck by asking her to try it on for you, but most women do enjoy giving advice on which color, size and style you should buy. Bonus: she might automatically assume you're shopping for your girlfriend, that is, until you break the news to her.

Think outside the bar

A bar seems like an easy place to meet women, beautiful, single women consuming alcohol. But the problem is they don't want to meet you at a bar. To prove to the ladies that you have more substance than a light ale, you need to make more of an effort than throwing on a black shirt and some aftershave. You need to go to places where she can see that you are a well-rounded guy with interests and a functioning brain.

Not only will the extra effort help to enhance your personality and your appeal, but it also gives you the chance to meet a more exceptional woman, one who has better things to do than stand at the bar and wait for you to buy her a drink.
http://ca.askmen.com/top_10/dating_top_ten/49c_dating_list.html#ixzz2H57EmOkv

There I just gave you a place to meet women.

Best part is- if you fail at getting one or get the impression of a creep you can always try again with another while getting better at it each time.

Picking up girls is a skill. REMEMBER THIS. Every skill I start I start with embarrassing moments full of confusion.
 

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Reposed in awesomeness...
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Forget about "picking" anyone up. If you don't have basic social skills it isn't going to happen. you have to start out just talking to people in general. Basic conversational stuff with people in shops, etc. You have to lay out a solid foundation before you can begin to build...
 

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See bold^

I know how you feel but you need to change your self image and start trying. I share the same problems. You will never change if you don't try. Do it and reap rewards similar to that of gold and diamonds in treasure chests which tail great stories to be told. Try and you will gain some good stories to be told. Share them with these women you plan on failing with until you succeed :yes

Have faith and believe in yourself!
I couldn't agree more with this. The reason you don't think it will happen is only because it hasn't happened yet. You haven't yet learned how to start a relationship (of any kind) with a girl. In other words, you haven't yet learned the social skills required to do so. Once you figure that out, you'll be perfectly capable of doing so. Wanting to change things is the first step. Putting yourself out there is the next - and, in my opinion, most difficult - step.
 

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so I have it in my head for this year that I want to begin developing the skills to be able to talk to females around my age, it can start as just talking to being friends, I don't think it will happen because I lack the confidence, the motivation, and especially the skills, damn I'm 28 and I never had a female friend other than when I was a kid so I don't think that really counts since I was too young and I don't really remember much about it, should I just get this idea out of my head, the committed action is what really counts but it's just a thought in my head right now.
Confidence can be faked. Surprisingly, it's pretty easy. I'd say things that (I thought) were obviously sarcastic and self-deprecating, but it would actually invoke a completely different reaction in people than what I imagined. If you have the ability to publicly deface yourself, apparently people can construe that as confidence. As I've learned more about how people react to things, I've actually gotten pretty confident for realz.

Motivation - If you're feeling like you really want to make this change in your life, then it must be weighing on you fairly heavily. Which implies that you do have a strong motivation to figure this out.

You're constantly starting threads that ask people about their backgrounds or their opinions or just posing questions that make people think, so I'm convinced you actually do have the skills to be interesting/attractive to women.

I've never really made any female friends on my own either, but I do know that all of my guy-friends' wives love having me around. This reinforces my opinion that my inability to attract women isn't due to who I am, but more about what I'm not doing (finding ways to actually meet them).
 

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I wish I can do better then this. I cant get past the hello part, not even to being their friend. and intimacy and a date I can barely get passed step one so I dont beleive it. I lack confidence and I never cared about their age but trynig this at this age is really hard. I started doing karaoke almost 2 years ago and that helped me build something. but I seen a comment about someone for everyone and least expect it. its hard for me to beleive this.
 
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