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one stop away
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I've been going jogging with my long time friend and her co-workers recently. Last time we went, there was a woman I had never met before, and I was too freaked out to know how to approach her or introduce myself or anything like that--especially since she was the most in-shape person of all of us. She was there today, and we ended up hanging out after the jogging session (all of us) and since she lived close to me she offered to walk home with me (since it was getting dark and I don't like walking alone at night).

Anyway, we ended up talking about a lot of things and I even admitted to her that I had SA. I always tend to do that with new people I meet to gauge whether or not they are turned off by my personality. Maybe I shouldn't be so open. I'm regretting baring my soul to her already but I like being able to you know? She told me deep things about her family too, so it wasn't completely one sided.

I am so sick of the unwritten rule which dictates that people who are just starting to know each other must do so gradually via small talk (ie: useless, meaningless banter). When I meet somebody I put all my cards on the table and hope for the best. Admittedly it's not the most effective method for making friends. It scares me, and I regret it afterwards but I felt tonight like I really connected with somebody--and that's what makes it worth it for me. That's what keeps me from learning to appreciate whatever cultural value is somehow inherent in small talk. I have less friends that most of my friends, I don't have many people but those I do have I am strongly connected to on a level I love.

Sorry, I wasn't expecting to write so much. The short version of the above is: I think I made a new friend/jogging buddy today, I'm surprisingly optimistic about this potential friendship, and I hate small talk. :boogie
 

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Melinda, that's awesome! I dislike small-talk too (although I've gotten a little better at it lately), and I think we forget that plenty of other non-SA people also dislike it. They just want to meet people like you who can be open and honest. Disliking small-talk doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. You may have SA, but I think you've got it together better than a lot of people running around, because you're being yourself! Wayda go!!
 

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Thats wonderful news Melinda. I tend to get really worked up when I make a new friend and end up giving them too much attention (like trying to talk to them VERY often etc), so I hope you mange this new friendship in a more calmer way.
 
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