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about social anxiety because I got so sick of everyones ignorance and especially the few people I considered my "friends" didnt even reply to it. Ive tried to explain it to some people before bcause I came clean telling them I didnt like how they left out and stuff and they just said that they have things they dont liek about their lives aswell but they dont parade it around or talk about it. one of them made a comment saying "its awkward reading this stuff from someone i personally get along with".i just didnt get that, (and boy if she thinks thats awkward she clearly doesnt know the meaning of the word). You consider yourself to "get along" with me,yet never make any contact to get in touch, what im doing, where i am,nothing and its the same with all of them.

weird that they were atleast a bit sympathetic and said they cant stand seeing me like I am and how muhc they want me to get better, basically saying they wuld want to help. They say these things but their actions say otherwise. They we should all meet up and start a fresh, but nothing came of it the week they said and I couldnt be bothered to go after them. Theyve made plans to go on holiday together; soo they want me to get better and cant stand seeing me upset yet dont bother to invite me or include me in anyway?? JUST ONCE i wanted someone to put themselves out for me.

SO that didnt come to anything and so came to a few days ago when i decided to send the facebook message. It was more third person but still about me cause i talked about my own experience. This time none of them replied. A girl I barely know sent me a message back saying that she appreciated me sharing it with everyone and that its really made her think about things. THAT is all i wanted,why cant the people who I want to care, care!!? Everyone that lives miles away are the people are most considerate and have two close friends in america (im in uk) who are everything i want in a friend, why cant i find that here??! The "friends" here have all just ignored it and getting on with their lives. They havent spoke to me since.

I justreall dont understand why bother saying to me that first time about how they want to be my friend, when they OBVSLY dont. I get mixed messages and thats why i never know when to just give up with them but I think the time has come now. Or ami just being unreasonable and perhaps they just dont know what to say to me? But if one can then i dont see why they cant.

This has been building up for along time and recently just been particularly down about my lack of friendships and social activity. I actually love to spend time with my family, but it would be so nice to have the choice and to have that normal ongoing life that everyone does. Im angry that I feel like I deserve it asmuch as the nextperson. Yet I stay home crying while everyone else is out there. Maybe I m just hanging on for nothing with these people. Being on facebook doesnt help. I dunno. Thoughts?
 

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I feel lonely all the time. I find facebook helpful because it provides some social interaction. Luckily I know everyone on my 'friends' list and I met them face-to-face.
 

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about social anxiety because I got so sick of everyones ignorance and especially the few people I considered my "friends" didnt even reply to it. Ive tried to explain it to some people before bcause I came clean telling them I didnt like how they left out and stuff and they just said that they have things they dont liek about their lives aswell but they dont parade it around or talk about it. one of them made a comment saying "its awkward reading this stuff from someone i personally get along with".i just didnt get that, (and boy if she thinks thats awkward she clearly doesnt know the meaning of the word). You consider yourself to "get along" with me,yet never make any contact to get in touch, what im doing, where i am,nothing and its the same with all of them.

weird that they were atleast a bit sympathetic and said they cant stand seeing me like I am and how muhc they want me to get better, basically saying they wuld want to help. They say these things but their actions say otherwise. They we should all meet up and start a fresh, but nothing came of it the week they said and I couldnt be bothered to go after them. Theyve made plans to go on holiday together; soo they want me to get better and cant stand seeing me upset yet dont bother to invite me or include me in anyway?? JUST ONCE i wanted someone to put themselves out for me.

SO that didnt come to anything and so came to a few days ago when i decided to send the facebook message. It was more third person but still about me cause i talked about my own experience. This time none of them replied. A girl I barely know sent me a message back saying that she appreciated me sharing it with everyone and that its really made her think about things. THAT is all i wanted,why cant the people who I want to care, care!!? Everyone that lives miles away are the people are most considerate and have two close friends in america (im in uk) who are everything i want in a friend, why cant i find that here??! The "friends" here have all just ignored it and getting on with their lives. They havent spoke to me since.

I justreall dont understand why bother saying to me that first time about how they want to be my friend, when they OBVSLY dont. I get mixed messages and thats why i never know when to just give up with them but I think the time has come now. Or ami just being unreasonable and perhaps they just dont know what to say to me? But if one can then i dont see why they cant.

This has been building up for along time and recently just been particularly down about my lack of friendships and social activity. I actually love to spend time with my family, but it would be so nice to have the choice and to have that normal ongoing life that everyone does. Im angry that I feel like I deserve it asmuch as the nextperson. Yet I stay home crying while everyone else is out there. Maybe I m just hanging on for nothing with these people. Being on facebook doesnt help. I dunno. Thoughts?
Sorry to hear what is going on. I would just leave those "friends" alone. You definately don't need people like that in your life. Or at least trying to get them to understand what you are going through.

People complain when things go wrong, but when somebody asks for help they turn the other way.

Sounds like you have a good family. I'd turn to them.
 

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they just said that they have things they dont liek about their lives aswell but they dont parade it around or talk about it. one of them made a comment saying "its awkward reading this stuff from someone i personally get along with".i just didnt get that, (and boy if she thinks thats awkward she clearly doesnt know the meaning of the word).
that's uncool. You were telling her about your problems and she replied that it made her feel uncomfortable. wouldn't a friend try to comfort someone who was confessing something like that, not make them feel ashamed for trying to get something off their chest?

It depends on how close these people are to you. Some friendships aren't as personal as others. If you never talked about serious issues with them before, it might be seen as awkward. I had friends I hung around with at school that I didn't have a deep connection with, I reserved personal discussions for my closer friend because I trusted her. It's hard to find good friends who will stick by you through difficult times.
 

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Your experience is not at all unusual. Most people just say stuff and don't intend on following through with it, and the same kind of crap happens here in America. But, you did find a couple people who liked what you had to say, and unfortunately for you they live in a different country!

So, what the next step to do is to find people in your country who are like the two that you find. They are rare but they do exist. A great place to find sympathy would be here (obviously), and possibly an anxiety support group of some kind.

People who are not there and trying to help you in your time of need are not your friends, especially people who plan their own things and go out of their way to not include you. They are mere acquaintances, and are best kept at quite a distance from you, emotionally speaking. You can still interact and have fun, but don't try to include them in your personal issues, such as with the anxiety.

You can find people that are willing to hear and learn about your anxiety, and that is why I encourage you to find an anxiety support group in your area. Check out your local NAMI branch (or similar organization), local library, and call area counseling centers and ask if they know of any free anxiety support groups run in the area. It's a great way to get started and for finding real friends, friends who are there in time of need. Good luck and be sure to ask me questions if you have any!
 
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