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"Why So Serious?"
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I have noticed since about 3 to 5 years ago I started having these uncontrollable anger rages. I mean it gets really bad and my mom is the best one at bringing this out. I mean really small things make me snap, just a simple "can you grab that and bring it" at work makes me pissed. I feel like saying "get it yourself you lazy f-k" or cussing them out but I just can't or I will get fired.

Something weird happens too when I get pissed off. The past two fist fights I got in I snapped and gave the other dudes an *** whooping and I don't even know how I managed to do it. Just this past Friday me my best friend and his cousins we got into a fight with some others dudes and I started breathing very hard. All I remember is the dude I was fighting just kept dropping to the floor everytime he got up to trade punches. I don't remember how I did it at all, heck I don't even know how to fight. Then I came back to reality and I got scared because I didn't realize what my mind was doing so I backed off and actually apologized. Same thing when I fought my sisters husband, I don't remember a thing until I came back to reality and I was standing up while he was just there laying dazed. I am not saying I am this UFC fighter of any sorts but sometimes I am afraid I going to hurt someone really bad. Once I am pissed off I can't control myself at all, I get scared of what I may do because I am afraid that I may do something like mortally wound someone while not being in my right state of mind. It gives me the chills just thinking about it. I really think I need medication.
 

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Listen. I have almost the same problem as you. I only realized recently (like a week ago) that anger=anxiety. For the past 6 or so years (since I was 12) I have been this anger machine. I'll be doing something, my mom will ask me to do the dishes, and i'll start yelling at her. Something simple can send my temperature rising. It got a little better, but then it got worse. Once, I was angry over my sister taking something of mine and i was getting so frustrated. my family was staring at me and someone said "You can't get that anger. You are going to hurt yourself" and they were right...I normally have low blood pressure, but I could feel it, and i felt tight, my face was crimson, I felt sweaty and sick and horrible..

I've realized that because I live in an anxiety bubble, constantly trying to numb myself, when i get interrupted, I tend to respond visciously, because I just want the distraction to go away.

Not in a profound way. Something stupid like being asked to turn off the light will make me fume. I only recently equated anger with fear and anxiety. You know, like how an injured pet will bite and scratch you. They just wnat you to go away and leave them alone.

But in those rare moments where I am at ease, these tasks mean nothign to me and i do them without a problem.
 

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I hear you!

But imagine this: I am a GRANDMOTHER, for crying out loud. I have been a gentle, peaceful person for most of my life. I love my grandbabies, my pets, sappy romantic movies. . .

But a couple of months ago, I started getting these irrational flashes of absolute RAGE, like you describe. One of our cats has this irritating habit of always getting underfoot - he has done it for years - and everybody just steps around him and goes on their way. I have started having this incredibly powerful urge to kick his furry backside across the room. (Haven't done it and probably won't, but just having the urge to do it is totally abnormal for me.)

Same thing with people. As you describe, it takes little or nothing for some people to get on my nerves so badly I want to beat the living daylights out of them! I have never, ever been this way - and it scares me!

I don't know why I have suddenly become so irritable, and I don't know what to do.
 

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I can't relate to the rage episodes, but i am worried you are going to get in legal trouble by accident. You say you dissociate and that must be scary to come out of it and only then realize what you just did. One of these times you could kill someone in a rage and will pay the rest of your life for an act that only took minutes to do. (Even if you don't get a life sentence, you'll have a criminal record the rest of your life. Or, if you never get caught, you'll still have it on your conscience forever.)

I don't know how old you are. If you are a teenager, I guess its normal for teens to be angry about something and it might mellow out in time. But still, in the meantime, you have to do something.

Starting now, when you get that mad, LEAVE the situation. Really try to pay attention to your body's signals that you're about to "snap" & leave then. Don't hang around to try to fix it, cuz once you snap, you're not really in control of your behavior all the way.

I always believe that rage is surely covering something else up. The person in the present is doing or saying something that triggers your rage, but it's connected to something in the past (especially cuz you're dissociating and the anger isn't appropriate to the present situation, is it?) Also maybe a psychiatrist could help you with medication. I don't know too much about medications.

I CAN relate to feeling murderous rage, but I can't relate to the part of acting it out. Instead I yell, run away, & cry mostly. Cry for hours if I have to.

But your title really says it all--Anger Management. Good Luck! I hope you can get help fast! Obviously, your concern shows you are not a mean person and you really don't want to hurt anyone. :yes
 

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To the OP: I think you might have bi-polar disorder. I really think you should see a doctor and tell them your symptoms. Dont tell them what you think you have, just tell them about your symptoms and ask what they think it is.

I only say this because I have a friend that reminds me exactly of you. He gets uncontrollable rage to the point where it scares me to death because I can tell that it is something he cannot control. He has lost many jobs already and I fear that he will end up in jail if he cannot find a way to control it.

He has a certain "tipping point" where if he crosses it, he will go into rage. He has been diagnosed Bi-Polar but is unwilling to take medications. Fortunately he has been going to therapy and it seems he is making little bits of progress.
 

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I have the same problem, I could just explode for absolutely no reason at all, except some little thing that sparks all this anger inside of me. I know exactly what you are going through, I know exactly the level of anger you are feeling, and it's so much that everyone would be scared when you get angry. I'm sure you got a lot of energy and normally a quiet, reserved guy. You have to learn to think different like why are you getting mad over what this guy is doing? Believe me, I have these thoughts all the time, but you just have to rationalize with yourself about why you are getting so worked up about it? Why get mad, either help him or just say no. It's not worth it to smack him over it. Believe me, it's easier said than done, but you just have to instill this thinking, even though you are bound to fail once in a while while you struggle to defeat this.

Personally, I think the best thing to do is learn to fight. Take a style of martial arts or boxing, MMA, wrestling, a style that suits you. The more I been learning how to fight and how to control my breathing and energy, the less inclined I been to fight people because you'll learn to have control your abilities and also to hone them and you'll know for a fact that you'll be able to kick a lot of peoples asses. But you'll also learn that's still that a few that if they got your hands on you they'll **** you up bad. You probably have a sadistic anger, a high pain tolerance. Put it to good use in a constructive way. One day, you might attack the wrong person, underestimate them, and they'll beat the piss out of you.
 

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sp chick
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wow ...this is crazy..i can totally relate... anxiety does lead to anger... my mom is the sweetest person in the world and for some reason i am always snapping at her for little things and i feel really bad it afterwards...I guess I am too frustrated with this ****ing social anxiety bull**** and I just lash out for the stupidest little things... it sucks because i did it to my boyfriend one too many times and i drove him away :( my sister always tells me i need anger management...maybe shes right...or maybe i need to get rid of this stupid fuqin social anxiety !! ahhhhhhhh i just want to scrEAMMMMM!!
 

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Beautiful Mess
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throw ice cubes in an empty bath tub. it makes me feel so powerful!
 

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nardil user since 2006
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339 Posts
you could get your testosterone checked. believe it or not, low test. can cause symptons like being easily irratible, uncontrollable rage, depression, anxiety, loss of feelings of well being...
 
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