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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I just recently turned 18 (yes I know i'm "young") and I've suffered from multiple forms of anxiety since I was a little child. What also came along with this was depression, and it has hit really hard tonight and I have no clue why. I feel like a part of me is dead/gone. I don't know any other way to explain it. I definitely don't feel suicidal, but I really wouldn't mind if someone killed me or I just randomly died. I literally have nothing besides my mother in my life, and I love her with all my heart but I need something more you know? I don't know what to do anymore. I've been from psychiatrist to psychiatrist, from medicine to medicine. I hate typing/talking about this type of stuff because it sounds like I'm some ungrateful brat, but it's the complete opposite of that. I'm beyond thankful for everything and everyone I have in my life, I'm just not happy with myself mentally.
 

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suh dude
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I went through a pretty rough period of depression in high school. At my worst, sometimes I would be alone in my room at night and my eyes would start to tear up and I would feel a pressure in my chest. Its not fun to go through. I had to really look inside myself and figure out what was causing my depression and start taking baby steps to improve it. You dont sound ungrateful and im sure you dont feel that way, so dont worry about that. As you point out you are young, so you have plenty of time to improve :) Welcome to the forums!
 

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Welcome, Indierror! :)
 

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SUS Member
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Hi Indierror.

I went through something similar when I was about 16-17. I literally felt like I was empty inside and used to wander around town at night not caring whether I lived or died. I got over it and have even had periods of incredible gratitude and enjoyment of life. I actually think all those walks are what cured me. What you're feeling right now can change for the better and it can change in a big way.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thank you all, it truly is a relief knowing I'm not the only one. Thank you for the welcoming and the support, I look forward to being apart of the SAS family.
 

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Welcome. Please always feel free to share your thoughts and feelings. This is a safe place to do that.
 
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