Social Anxiety Support Forum banner
1 - 4 of 4 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
It seems as if no one really understands severe social anxiety, unless they have it themselves. What’s worse is the fact that barely anyone really seems to want to understand.

I live my life trying to hide it from everyone, because i don’t want to seem like I’m seeking attention, or just seem plain weird and crazy. The fact of the matter is, social anxiety has ruined my life. I dropped out of school when i was 12, i literally spent 3 years without leaving the house, unless i was forced to for some reason, i.e. a doctor’s appointment. Here i am now at 17, and things haven't gotten much better, I’m completely incapable of being independent like i want to be. Just to give a few examples, i can’t leave the house alone, i can’t go into a shop alone to buy things, i can’t take buses, i can’t even call up the doctors or something if i need an appointment. I’m completely reliant on my dad, he has to do everything for me and i hate it, it’s so frustrating not being able to just get on with my life like a normal person, not to mention the huge burden its placing on my dad and the rest of the family. I would love to be able to get a job, and go to college and actually just be productive in some way, but how can i? If i can’t even manage to leave the house alone or talk to people i don’t know, how could i go out alone to a workplace and cope with interacting with not only colleagues, but probably customers too? The thing that really pissed me off, is the fact that people just think I’m lazy, they think I’m just another irresponsible teenager on the dole, who just can’t be bothered doing anything and wants to sit around getting money for nothing and spending it on alcohol and/or drugs. The fact is, i hate it! i want more than anything to be able to get out there and do things, sitting around this house doing nothing all the time is driving me insane, but I’m trapped.

As a side note, i should probably mention that when people have seen me out, or in social situations, that is only possible because of alcohol. If I’m going to go out or do anything, i need to drink first, and even then i can’t get rid of the anxiety. So yeah, I’m probably turning into an alcoholic too, yay!

I have started therapy, but i've been going to therapy since i was 13 and it hasn't helped in the slightest. Not to mention battling the severe depression and low self-esteem this has caused me, really isn’t helping my motivation.I hate myself for letting this ridiculous, irrational fear take over my life. I spend most of my time in bed, or watching mindless tv programmes, anything that will distract me from thinking about my life. Most of the time i just want to give up.


What am i supposed to do? :(
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
109 Posts
I also have very severe SA. But pretending it wasn't there somehow got me through school. (My last year of high school was the worst SA.) Do you have siblings, Shaza? I think what helped me slowly learn to do things on my own was by one, getting my siblings' help and two, not wanting to reveal my SA by taking on the same responsibilities my siblings did. My older sister has always been so responsible and capable. ALL my siblings were, and if I was different I worried my SA would show through. I was still late at lots of things. Like the first time I went shopping by myself was my first year of college.

There's got to be something you can start with to get you out in the world. Why don't you talk to us here and we'll try and help you find it? ;)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
28 Posts
darling you need to do something right now, talk about what you feel in therapy, it's a good thing for your anxiety, don't just sit in front of the tv, start doing something.
like taking your dog on a walk, going to somewhere near your house, like a shop or smt, small things, so then you will feel confident to do bigger things.
don't feel embarrased, mental diseases are the same that physical ones, it's not your fault.
you should go to a phychiatrist, they can give you some meeds, they will make it easier for you, it's not fair you are feeling this miserable.
my best wishes for you Shazarush :)
 
1 - 4 of 4 Posts
Top