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Allons-y!
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I work at the front desk of a drug treatment clinic. It's about the worst job for a mild-mannered person with social anxiety. I only took it because I'd been unemployed for two years and I was beyond broke. I have horrible, horrible people arguing with me and yelling at me and swearing at me day in, day out. It doesn't help that fellow staff members and "professionals" from other offices can also be insensitive. I've been there a year and a half, but I feel like I've reached my breaking point. They come up with new rules all the time and pretend to take the front desk's input but really they do whatever they want. It all just leads to more work for me and more dealing with angry people. I'm in a constant state of anxiety to the point where I feel it physically. I'm tense all the time and nauseous. I want to claw at my arms. I want to hit things. I don't enjoy weekends or days off anymore because I just spend my time dreading the next time I have to go in. I had to hunt down a bottle of wine right now to try to ease some of the anxiety.

I've been applying to other places, but besides a couple of interviews that have gone nowhere there's been no opportunity to leave. I don't feel like I can just quit because I have massive bills and I can't risk being unemployed for another 2 years. I was thinking of talking to my supervisor, even though there's not really anything she can do to make it better. I don't even know how I would approach that conversation--"I'm about to have a nervous breakdown if I stay here any longer"? I cried there the other day so it wouldn't be that big of a surprise how I'm feeling, but it's still an awkward discussion to have.

That was long, but I dunno. Maybe someone else has been in the same position and has some advice. Thanks for reading.
 

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That sounds like a tough situation, Nyx. I commend the fact that you have been there for so long! If you need to stay (and it seems that you are suggesting this), then it may help you to remember that these angry people are not mad at you but with their own personal frustrations. It doesn't excuse their behavior, but maybe you can see this as a way to detach from them.
 

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Finally a Job that doesn't make me HATE living

I have never been able to keep a job. I actually was let go once because "I was too unhappy" after 2 months. I used to take muscle relaxers to get through the anxiety of being out and it allowed me to keep jobs for awhile. When they got too out of control and I had to stop (after a hospital stay). Driving to work and hating waking up, getting dressed and being around people. :afr
I prayed for a job where I can be with my animals, not be harrassed by a boss, keep learning, be challenged and appreciated and help people. Well, God heard me.
I have been working full time AT HOME for a legitimate company helping customers for a year. I started at $9 an hour so I had to work OT to get by.
Who knew? I still can't stand leaving the house but now I'm not forced to on a daily basis. I also work nights so I can sleep in, which I love. BTW, the company has night shifts available now.
So there is always hope if we don't give up (and we don't have to leave the house :D to find it.)
 

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That sounds like a tough situation, Nyx. I commend the fact that you have been there for so long! If you need to stay (and it seems that you are suggesting this), then it may help you to remember that these angry people are not mad at you but with their own personal frustrations. It doesn't excuse their behavior, but maybe you can see this as a way to detach from them.
Depersonalise...the only way you are going to survive...just keep telling yourself....."I am OK. I am fine. I am the sane one". As Gilt said you have done well to stay there so long. I think everyone has a nightmare story to tell from their work history. Mine was from teaching. Honestly, I hardly slept for a year. But one day this will all seem so insignificant..so hang in there!
 
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I am in a similar situation, have a love hate relationship with my job. Feel I'm in over my head at times and the anxiety levels are off the roof.

It's so important to remember that you are just another uniform at work, if customers are yelling at you, they're angry with the organisation so keep that in mind. Go for walks to let steam off. I used to work as a credit control officer and had an intense level of customer abuse. I know what you mean about weekends, I stress and fret and can't enjoy it properly.

Hope another opportunity comes along soon, keep applying for other jobs, there is always a chance you'll get something better.
 

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Allons-y!
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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thanks everyone. I think I've gone past the point where I can detach. I was never very good at that and it's become nearly impossible. I spoke to my supervisor today...well more like I cried at my supervisor today. I'm still not sure about what to do.
 

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Nyx - I can totally feel for you. I have been having a 'cry' day at work myself. It started off 2 weeks ago when for once I stood up for myself and was assertive. Sadly when the 'quiet' one erupts, it erupts like a monster. I was so angry that day I almost had an out of body experience. Today that incident came up again (boss told another boss who told his secretary to have a chitchat with me). It was totally my right to stand up for myself and I made that clear, but as the conversation kept going about work-work ethics-relationships, I had a hard time trying not scream out that fact that I've HATED this job from day 1. (somehow they think I've been happy) How I wish I could quit right this second.

But we both need to hang in there - focus on the things you do when you are not at work. If there are annoying people around you, avoid them as much as you can. Imagine this is to be a movie and the director will say 'cut' any second - that almost always seem to work with my diluted mind.
 

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Nyx - I can totally feel for you. I have been having a 'cry' day at work myself. It started off 2 weeks ago when for once I stood up for myself and was assertive. Sadly when the 'quiet' one erupts, it erupts like a monster. I was so angry that day I almost had an out of body experience. Today that incident came up again (boss told another boss who told his secretary to have a chitchat with me). It was totally my right to stand up for myself and I made that clear, but as the conversation kept going about work-work ethics-relationships, I had a hard time trying not scream out that fact that I've HATED this job from day 1. (somehow they think I've been happy) How I wish I could quit right this second.

But we both need to hang in there - focus on the things you do when you are not at work. If there are annoying people around you, avoid them as much as you can. Imagine this is to be a movie and the director will say 'cut' any second - that almost always seem to work with my diluted mind.
I find the advantages of being grumpy are you don't suddenly explode with anger. I suffer less explosions these days because I'm more likely to speak my mind.

Movie..acting good idea. Third personing, I call it.
 

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I've felt that way at jobs. The only long term solution was to move on, but if that's impossible anti-anxiety and/or anti-depressant medication can help. Scouring job listings is a lot more pleasant with something to drink but you don't want to do that to excess. Talking to family or friends can help clarify in your own mind what you think you should do and it can be stress relieving. Talking to a supervisor can help if they are able to change things to lessen the stress. Don't let yourself get to a breaking point where you quit without giving notice, that can only hurt your options.
Too true. I have quit some jobs in the past too soon, when I didn't really have a good exit plan. What is it?.........out of the kitchen into the frying pan?..something like that.
 

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Allons-y!
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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Unfortunately there is no avoiding the annoying people. I'm the one that has to deal with them. I'm trying to get to that point where I just quit without a backup plan. I've done it once and it did not go well. I got a call from a lady I'd interviewed with a few weeks ago. I didn't get the position I'd gone in for, but she said another one had opened up and she wanted to know if I was interested. So I'm hoping it's an actual offer and that I'll be able to get out of my current situation. I will hopefully get a hold of her Monday and I'll update.
 

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Sounds like a hard job, but well done for keeping it for so long.

I absolutely hate my job too - well i actually like the work its just my boss who makes it so hard for me.
 

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Unfortunately there is no avoiding the annoying people. I'm the one that has to deal with them. I'm trying to get to that point where I just quit without a backup plan. I've done it once and it did not go well. I got a call from a lady I'd interviewed with a few weeks ago. I didn't get the position I'd gone in for, but she said another one had opened up and she wanted to know if I was interested. So I'm hoping it's an actual offer and that I'll be able to get out of my current situation. I will hopefully get a hold of her Monday and I'll update.
I hope that this new job that opened up will be the job for you and that you will be able to leave the front desk job and transfer to this new position. Working at the front desk is VERY stressful, you are dealing with people over the phone and face to face and it is very tense and unpredictable. I used to work at the front desk and now I work in medical records and I don't have as much stress as I did with the front desk position, I don't deal with any phone calls or customers so my stress has been greatly reduced. I hope that you are able to find something that is less stressful than your current position. Good luck to you!!!
 

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Don't like my job anymore either. I don't mind a lot of my clients, it is just the constant increasing work load, *****y staff, and bad office politics that make the job not fun to be at. I try to go in the earliest so I don't have to deal with coworkers. I am totally wore out at the end of the day. I been falling asleep at 7 pm due to being so tired.
 

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Seasonal Affected Disorde
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The good thing is that you have a job. Many people are unemployed now. I think the reason why people may be shouting, and swearing, maybe because they are not being heard. If you face rude customer, you have to be considerate of their feelings. Especially if its urgent for them to get meds I think. Like, learn interpersonal skills, on how to deal with customers.

Let say you did, and they are still rude, then at least you didnt do anything wrong. You should always make it your buisness to be kind to people, it will always help and you will feel better about it too.

But if you are unhappy about it, you can talk to your manager about a different job position within the company.
 

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insert witty comment here
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Unfortunately there is no avoiding the annoying people. I'm the one that has to deal with them. I'm trying to get to that point where I just quit without a backup plan. I've done it once and it did not go well. I got a call from a lady I'd interviewed with a few weeks ago. I didn't get the position I'd gone in for, but she said another one had opened up and she wanted to know if I was interested. So I'm hoping it's an actual offer and that I'll be able to get out of my current situation. I will hopefully get a hold of her Monday and I'll update.
Hope this potential job works out for you. :)

If it doesn't work out then teach yourself about assertiveness and handling difficult people. There are lots of books on that. You won't be able to change those people but you can make large changes to how you speak to them and how you allow them to speak to you. :)
 

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Allons-y!
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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
I hope that this new job that opened up will be the job for you and that you will be able to leave the front desk job and transfer to this new position. Working at the front desk is VERY stressful, you are dealing with people over the phone and face to face and it is very tense and unpredictable. I used to work at the front desk and now I work in medical records and I don't have as much stress as I did with the front desk position, I don't deal with any phone calls or customers so my stress has been greatly reduced. I hope that you are able to find something that is less stressful than your current position. Good luck to you!!!
Yes this job I interviewed for is mostly medical records with some front desk thrown in, so I'm hoping it would be a lot less stressful. I'm glad you found something more calm :)
 

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giggling ******
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I hate my job and have been doing it for over eight years.

I took a demotion to get out of the stress it was causing, but the new position is very worse, with talking to people and all, and basically interviewing.

I need to get promoted to management so I can concentrate on doing my one thing per week, which is what management seems to do.
 
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I hate my job. It's mindless, boring, has nothing to do with who I am and what I enjoy, and it pays HORRIBLY.
 
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