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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Most girls want someone who is talkative right?
My behavior must be a turn off to most girls. I can make a great first impression but then I withdraw. I'm so afraid of opening up that I start avoiding them. Even if I go on a date, I'd be a nervous wreck. I'm just that uncomfortable around semi-attractive women. I'll eventually be 30 having never had a girlfriend and I act awkward.

I'm so used to being alone. What should I do? I'm very concerned about the direction that my single life will take me. Because while most people can date, I just have a hard time unless the girls have interest in the shy quiet guy... but most really DON'T.

I know most people have problems, and I would like to have any other problem than this. This is the most frustrating and it makes me feel like an outcast loser. What am I so F'in afraid of??
 

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Hiding In My Den
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I like shy guys...as for quiet thats ok at first but after a while I'll want them to be talkative around me. Guess I want someone like me whose SA isn't so bad 1-1. As for groups they can be quiet as a mouse for all I care.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
I don't have any advice for you, sorry. I just wanted to say that I like shy/quiet guys, so they are out there!
so you like the guy who sits there in a group not talking?
who isn't funny and you can sense insecurity?
people lose respect for that type
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I suppose since I have "issues" myself, the only type of girls attracted to the quiet/shy types are the girls who also have self esteem issues. Most "normal" girls only find confidence attractive
 

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Chief Worrier
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i like shy/quiet guys, because i'm quiet myself most of the time. i like guys that CAN carry a conversation but can also sit in total silence for an hour with me and not be uncomfortable. i've only met one guy like that, so far. you just have to be friends first, i guess, and then you'll be comfortable enough that when you date you won't be too nervous to talk.
honestly, i get annoyed by guys who are too extroverted because they all seem obnoxious.
 

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I'm with tigerlily here. I am very attracted to quiet guys that I feel comfortable with because I can truely relate to them. I find that they are the most genuine of guys and are very perceptive and sensitive. I actually hold more respect for those types of guys. Like tigerlily stated I think that being comfortable is key...sometimes what you might think is awkard for another person...like if you have a lot of quiet moments totally isnt for another person because they could actually be enjoying how comfortable they feel around you. Idk. You should embraced this aspect of yourself because I know that there are girls who really are attracted to your type and no not all of them are just quiet girls. I've met many people, including some of my relatives who are total opposites with the girl being outgoing and the guy being quiet.
i like shy/quiet guys, because i'm quiet myself most of the time. i like guys that CAN carry a conversation but can also sit in total silence for an hour with me and not be uncomfortable. i've only met one guy like that, so far. you just have to be friends first, i guess, and then you'll be comfortable enough that when you date you won't be too nervous to talk.
honestly, i get annoyed by guys who are too extroverted because they all seem obnoxious.
 

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Done with SA
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I don't know about all girls, bit I don't think I'd be all that comfortable with a guy who was too talkative and loud. Spontaneous, though, because I love spontaneity.
I don't really have much advice, but if you reel them in with a good first impression, figure out what got them interested in the first place and work on keeping that going, maybe.
Try not to withdraw and remember that first dates are pretty nerve-wrecking whether you have social anxiety or not and the girl is probably just as nervous and worried about making a good impression, too. :)
 

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Of course, SA girls like SA guys because they both can relate.

Extrovert girls, from my experience, dislike quiet guys. They see quietness as a sign of weakness and insecurity. They want outspoken, confident guys or as I like to call, ***holes.
 

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Chief Worrier
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well, in some cases a girl who talks a lot might be attracted to a quiet guy because he's a good listener. it could happen...
 

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subtastic
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Some girls like loud guys, some girls like quiet guys. I know a few women with very quiet boyfriends. I don't care either way, so long as the guy isn't some kind of crazy jerk.
 

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well, in some cases a girl who talks a lot might be attracted to a quiet guy because he's a good listener. it could happen...
I agree.
Plus, it's not just because you relate to the SA guy, but maybe you just like someone who is quiet. I personally think quiet guys are cute, SA or no.
 

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well, in some cases a girl who talks a lot might be attracted to a quiet guy because he's a good listener. it could happen...
My memory sucks! I completely forgot about this girl I took to my junior prom. She was an extrovert. I asked her out to prom because I knew she had a crush on me and I knew she wouldn't say no. 2 years later she still has a crush on me, even though I live far away. I haven't talk to her in like 3 months. Girls like her are extemeley hard to come by. I can't believe I forgot about her. So your right. It can happen.
 

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you will find someone..believing in you ;)
dream of it..
I have confidence in you for real..love is real and its yours already..and you will find it too..sweet.
 

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The only people I like are usually introverts. If we're talking about personality types, the only exceptions are usually for ENTP guys or ENFP girls. I value shyness as a positive quality that often correlates with being a highly sensitive person (to stimuli) and introversion. My ideal partner would be INFP/INFJ.

My question to you is: which girls are you noticing? Often the talkative and sociable people are the ones that first draw our attention (since they command it). Try to actively notice the more quiet people with the subtle personalities.

In my experience we often seem more like black holes than stars. A little harder to detect but much more interesting. :yes
 

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I actually prefer shy/quiet guys, most of the time. The extroverts, like someone else mentioned, are usually a bit too cocky for my taste. You just have to find the right girl.
 

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You will be fine dude, I dated a girl who by all standards was a loudmouth extrovert, but I liked her for ability to see things not seen by others.

Just get out there and do some stuff to get your mind off the whole relationship.
 

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well, in some cases a girl who talks a lot might be attracted to a quiet guy because he's a good listener. it could happen...
I've seen it happen. Hell, it's happened to me before. Different girls have different taste in men.
 
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