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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
For the last two years I have become a very unhappy and I know I have to do something with my life. I'm married and love my husband and we have a good relationship but he tends to be very controlling. I have always had a self conscience way about me and tend to have a low opinion of myself so I liked it in the first few years of are marriage and I loved being a stay at home mother. I didn't realize that not getting out in the work force for so many years would handicap me so bad. I became a recluse and slowly had no social life of my own. About 10 years ago I sought help with consoling which helped a lot. I also took meds which worked for me. I slowly came out of my shell. I found a job and came out of my shell. Well three years ago I lost my job and things just seemed to fall apart, now I'm back to being a recluse and losing my confidence in myself. The doctor I saw diagnosed my symptoms as "Social Anxiety". I took medication for 10 years and slowly weaned off it with a doctors' help I just don't want to be on medicine because of the side effects. I keep telling everyone I need to get another job or volunteer somewhere to have something to do but I'm so scared and keep putting it off. Well there's more to say but I'm going to leave it here for now I hope to be able to connect with some people and get some advice I posted along time ago on a similar site and I enjoyed getting some feed back and reading other post to get a perspective in my life.
 

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My eyes!!!

Hello fellow SAS member,

I wish to inform you that my mother has a similar issue, at least that is she gets upset when she isn't working. I'm not fully sure I should speak about marriages, as I haven't even been in a relationship! Yet, I can only advise you to further your knowledge in skills of trade or pick up a hobby that is common in your area. (Are you picky about what job you want? o.o )
 

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Welcome, LiveToRead! :)
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
That's good advice

Hello fellow SAS member,

I wish to inform you that my mother has a similar issue, at least that is she gets upset when she isn't working. I'm not fully sure I should speak about marriages, as I haven't even been in a relationship! Yet, I can only advise you to further your knowledge in skills of trade or pick up a hobby that is common in your area. (Are you picky about what job you want? o.o )
I know I need to get out of the house and have something that will make happy and fulfills my own self worth. My husband has always been the primary financial support for are family, I know I am very fortunate and that most wives are working as well to support their families. So it isn't a dire need to work so I don't have that incentive. I'm trying to get up the nerve to go out job searching.
I appreciate your candor and even though you are young you seem to see the big picture, thanks.:D
 

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For the last two years I have become a very unhappy and I know I have to do something with my life. I'm married and love my husband and we have a good relationship but he tends to be very controlling. I have always had a self conscience way about me and tend to have a low opinion of myself so I liked it in the first few years of are marriage and I loved being a stay at home mother. I didn't realize that not getting out in the work force for so many years would handicap me so bad. I became a recluse and slowly had no social life of my own. About 10 years ago I sought help with consoling which helped a lot. I also took meds which worked for me. I slowly came out of my shell. I found a job and came out of my shell. Well three years ago I lost my job and things just seemed to fall apart, now I'm back to being a recluse and losing my confidence in myself. The doctor I saw diagnosed my symptoms as "Social Anxiety". I took medication for 10 years and slowly weaned off it with a doctors' help I just don't want to be on medicine because of the side effects. I keep telling everyone I need to get another job or volunteer somewhere to have something to do but I'm so scared and keep putting it off. Well there's more to say but I'm going to leave it here for now I hope to be able to connect with some people and get some advice I posted along time ago on a similar site and I enjoyed getting some feed back and reading other post to get a perspective in my life.
Welcome....
It must be hard going from a working life to no life in a way.However hard it may seem you must do what you think is gets for a better happier life.Its clear that you enjoyed working and socialising and that was taken away from you.

Its never easy to get out of that shell,but we're all in the same boat one way or another and hopefully you like many on here will get lots of help and guidance.

I did what was best for me after having many of the symptons of "social anxiety"...Left my partner and im beggining to get on top of things slowly.Of cause all circumstances are diffrent,so this may not be the case for you:)
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thanks for your advice

It's been said the first step is always the hardest and I believe it. I think I sound like a bored housewife with my intro and that is partly true. I never was a comfortable person in groups always wondering; do they think I'm silly or stupid. I spent most of my youth feeling inadequate and had a low self esteem. I had plans for college and then I met my husband in my junior year and he became my everything. It's common for most people when they fall in love the first time you usually are in la la land and crazy about that special person. Well now after a lot of years I realize I never grew up and matured, I still feel like that inadequate teenager and trying to cope with the grownup world that I feel like I don't belong.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Update: I'm going to get out of the house and go to a women's meeting next Saturday it's a group that gets together once a month. I found the listing on this website for meet and greet, make friends. I'm hoping I will be okay, I mean I know I'll be nervous but I really want to find some friends that's one of my down falls I always loose touch with people and then I turn into a recluse.
 

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Welcome. I hope you find some relief here on the forums.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Update: I'm going to get out of the house and go to a women's meeting next Saturday it's a group that gets together once a month. I found the listing on this website for meet and greet, make friends. I'm hoping I will be okay, I mean I know I'll be nervous but I really want to find some friends that's one of my down falls I always loose touch with people and then I turn into a recluse.
Hi, I don't want to mislead anyone about what I said above. It was thru this website but I may have been directed to another website when I went to groups that meet up. I think I got redirected to another site for groups that meet up because I went to the Group section and there was a group for Shyness and social anxiety, Just wanted to add this.
 
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