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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So what is social anxiety disorder?

Hi, I'll call myself Zoey….
I'm wondering what social anxiety disorder is because maybe, maybe, I might have it, too.

Is it when you can't look someone in the eyes, and when you do, you're usually fidgeting with something else to distract yourself from looking them in the eye. (When you seem to be looking someone in the eye, like an honest man or woman should, you're so distracted by the fact that you've held a gaze for so long, you are no longer listening to what they are saying. Usually this gaze isn't too long, but it feels like forever).

Is it when you've spent years in college, failing or dropping out of classes because you don't seek help from your professors, don't come to class because you don't feel smart enough to engage in discussion, don't engage in group activity because your mind blanks. "That person said what I was basically thinking, but better". There's an extreme lack of confidence in your intellectual performance.

Is it when you realize you haven't invited your friends over in months. You say it's because you're busy (and you are), but when you have down time, it's better spent alone. You don't relax entertaining anyone, going out, or being around people.

Is it when you forget to call people. Perhaps you don't have the time, perhaps you don't think you have the "right" thing to say to them, you think they are expecting a different conversation and are expecting you to add to it. I guess every phone call comes with projected expectations.

Overall, (now this is more personal) you're grateful that you ended up with your boyfriend and your puppy, and as lovely as it is, those are the only two beings you see after and before work, or school, or a meeting you are required to attend. They are your social unit, and that is enough.


I'm worried because I don't feel like my friends feel they are valued. I don't even know if they are my friends anymore. I have more acquaintances than anything, because I'm nice, I just have a problem getting close and designating time to someone.
I'm worried because I feel my family is confused by me and doesn't seem comfortable with my lack of calls home. Sometimes calls are months apart.
I'm worried because I don't want to take my boyfriend away from any social life. He seems content and happy, and socializes somewhat more than I, but I think he has adopted my moods.
I'm worried because I have wasted the last seven years in college failing at being a student because it was nearly impossible to outreach, commit to appointments, or other things.

Finally, I am committing to finishing my degree, and finally, I am working with professors to show them I am valuable enough to pay some interest to in helping me direct a career. However, socially, (and social life, contacts and personal relationships are extremely valuable) I am non responsive, because I am exhausted by everything else.

So does this sound like someone who is maybe just a little bit of an *******, or does this sound like someone who might be dealing with some social anxiety?
 

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Welcome, UpsideTown! :)
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
It sounds like social anxiety to me. Do you get frightened by small talk and boredom?
Hi everyone,
I don't really get frightened by small talk, anymore. I have been in the customer service industry for about five years now and have had to adapt to making small talk. Sometimes it is difficult. When I am alone with someone I don't know well, or that expects conversation, it is hard for me to weave sentences together for the sake of conversation.
 
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