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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi, everyone, I am so glad I found this forum. :D
I have or I should say believe I suffer from SAD. I have never been to a Dr. about it or been formally diagnosed. Has anyone been to a Dr. and gone through treatment--A part of me wants to get help and another part of me does not. I do not like the idea of taking medications.
I have suffered from SAD since childhood. I am 25 yrs old. I have been married for 3 yrs and have an awesome hub. I also have a 20 month old child. I first heard about SAD a couple of years ago. Before, I ever knew such a disorder existed I just thought I was overly self-conscious, insecure, painfully shy, extra quiet paranoid person.
I have such a hard time talking to people and carrying on a conversation. I never know what to say and I constantly think I am being judged by others or I sound or look stupid. I talk really fast sometimes when I am nervous just to get it over with and then I sound even dumber :afr I have had two anxiety attacks as the result of a social situation.
Otherwise, I am just nervous and my mind races and I avoid situations which make me uncomfortable and cause me anxiety, simple things such as answering the door or phone. The thing is I really like going out and doing things with people, but when I do I am totally withdrawn and do not have fun like I want to. I see other people socializing and having a good time and I wish I could be more like that.
Is it worth getting help?? I am just so scared to get help for some reason like in a way I am comfortable with who I am and the thought of changing seems so scary. My hub thinks I should see a therapist. I think I want to...but I just don't know.

Please help me!!!
 

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you should learn about being a HSP: hsperson.com you can get some help there. abou 18% of the general population is highly sensitive, based on studies, and many people are realizing they fit into this category. As HSP you like socializing but you are more easily overstimulated. You can learn more about it at the link above and also there are more links there.

Also yes you maybe could get some help from working with a therapist. You should look for a good one, do some learning about what to look for, and do initial meetings with at least a few before you pick one. Personality as well as their training, ability, and what approach they use, makes a difference. The approach Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT is the type you should look for. But someone who uses a mixture of therapy approaches including CBT would work too.

And this site is great help!
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
you should learn about being a HSP: hsperson.com you can get some help there. abou 18% of the general population is highly sensitive, based on studies, and many people are realizing they fit into this category. As HSP you like socializing but you are more easily overstimulated. You can learn more about it at the link above and also there are more links there.

Also yes you maybe could get some help from working with a therapist. You should look for a good one, do some learning about what to look for, and do initial meetings with at least a few before you pick one. Personality as well as their training, ability, and what approach they use, makes a difference. The approach Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT is the type you should look for. But someone who uses a mixture of therapy approaches including CBT would work too.

And this site is great help!
I don't like socializing--I just want to be able to. Like, I will try and go to gatherings or whatever sometimes, but I feel so awkward and do not know what to do or say. I kind of panic inside racing my brain to figure out how to act and what I should say. And then when I say anything I replay it over and over in my head wondering if I sounded stupid. And, I feel so out of place. For the most part I avoid talking to people or meeting new people. I would just like to be able to be like other people I see having a good time and socializing.
 

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Hi there.

I can relate to some of the things you mention, such as avoiding situations and not knowing what to say etc. I'm currently trying to overcome my anxiety so I can function like a 'normal' social person but it is so hard.

I'm currently re-reading "Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness" by Gillian Butler. It has some useful information and advice about changing your thinking and behaviour and trying to reduce self-consciousness. I think I'm doing ok on the thinking part (I don't tend to have such negative thoughts - or so I thought until I left the house today) and I am also getting better on the self-consciousness front. I just haven't actually had to talk to anyone I don't know for a long time...

Anyway, when in a social situation, try to focus more on the other person, eg. what they're talking about, what they're wearing, what you think they're really like,etc. just to try to not focus on your anxious feelings. If you're not actually talking to someone, eg. you walk into a crowded room, try to focus on the other people, the surroundings etc. Then you won't have as much opportunity to build up anxiety. It's hard but it's worth a try.

Sorry not much but good luck with overcoming SA. :)
 

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You are unlikely to get over SA on your own if you have had it for years. If it is recent, then you could probably get over SA with the aid of a therapist or even on your own.

It sounds like you have done fairly well in spite of having Social Phobia. You are married and have a kid and you should be proud of yourself for this because most people here dont seem to have either.

Because your married, I gather that you probably have developed some social skills in the past. I think this will make you respond to meds better because sometimes meds help anxiety levels but people with no social skills dont really benefit from meds it seems.

If you dont think your SA is bad enough to try pills then you could see a therapist. Try and find someone with a PhD because these people usually know the most about therapy techniques that actually work.

You could go to a General Practitioner and just tell them you think you have SA and they will give you an SSRI and possibly some tranquilizers for panic attacks. SSRI's are incredibly safe to try and take long term. The main side effects are appetite/weight changes, and sexual side effects.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
You are unlikely to get over SA on your own if you have had it for years. If it is recent, then you could probably get over SA with the aid of a therapist or even on your own.

It sounds like you have done fairly well in spite of having Social Phobia. You are married and have a kid and you should be proud of yourself for this because most people here dont seem to have either.

Because your married, I gather that you probably have developed some social skills in the past. I think this will make you respond to meds better because sometimes meds help anxiety levels but people with no social skills dont really benefit from meds it seems.

If you dont think your SA is bad enough to try pills then you could see a therapist. Try and find someone with a PhD because these people usually know the most about therapy techniques that actually work.

You could go to a General Practitioner and just tell them you think you have SA and they will give you an SSRI and possibly some tranquilizers for panic attacks. SSRI's are incredibly safe to try and take long term. The main side effects are appetite/weight changes, and sexual side effects.
I like to think my SA kept me from meeting lots of guys and therefore if I had not had it I would not have met the awesome guy I have today. :)Will meds help me to have the motivation to have a conversation with someone? I just have little desire or care to conversate with people and make bs small talk b/c it makes me so uncomfortable I figure why bother. From what people have told me they think I am either *****y, stuck-up, or mean b/c I don't talk. What exactly will meds do to help?
 
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