[shuckey]

I've struggled with alcoholism for the past 5-6 years. It all started as a fun thing to do when out with friends, something that would get me buzzed and allow me to feel more social and confident. I loved how alcohol transformed my personality from shy and insecure to bubbly, confident, and outgoing.

I just want everyone to know that I'm trying my hardest to change. I still slip up sometimes and this whole mission to get sober has been far from perfect. I'm by no means cured. But I'm really trying. Not only for myself but for the people I hurt over the years. Thank you for reading.

 

[JH1983]

Can relate. Lost almost my entire 20's to opiate addiction. Will have 10 years off them this coming spring. I hope you succeed in getting sober.

 

[doc4]

Break the wheel man, destroy you vicious circle.

Sorry man, self-pitty won't do you any good, if you want to change than change.

 

[Socialmisfits]

Good post, you're a strong man to keep fighting that demon. I never was addicted to alcohol but I I am familiar with the buzzes you talk about. Good luck, I hope you find some support, you can't beat a demon on your own. Everything is easier in hindsight, take with you what you learned over the years and apply it over and over again.

 

[CNikki]

Glad that you are able to acknowledge the damage is doing not only to those around you but also to yourself. That's the first step when realizing that you need help. Seeking professional help is the best route for it.

As cliche as it is there is a saying that a person is not an addict, but rather, they are a person who became addicted. The former puts the label on as if it defines a person and therefore they cannot change.

 

[either/or]

You shouldn't be so hard on yourself, you are struggling with addiction which is a mental illness. You aren't wired the same as a non-addict. Your behavior is a consequence of the illness, it's not the true you. Any one of us could have found ourselves in the same spot you were in. Kudos to you though trying to find a path out of addiction.