Hello,
My little sister, unfortunately, suffers from severe social anxiety. She no longer goes to school because of this. She is 16 years old.
She spends her days at home watching cartoons, and browsing sites like reddit or stumble upon. She is bored out of her mind.
Both our parents suck. Our mom is a somewhat functioning alcoholic that puts a huge strain on the family. Our dad, on the other hand, doesn't play nearly a big enough of a part in our lives as he should. He does everything in his power to not involve himself with us, conflict, family issues etc. He'd rather shove a problem under the rug than deal with it, or better yet, dump it on someone else and run.
About a year and a half ago I approached my dad and told him I was really concerned with my sister being depressed, not attending school etc.
He told me "she'd snap out of it" and that everything would be fine in the end. I told him I didn't think so and forced him to find her a counsellor for her to see. He told me he didn't know how (typical response from him when you try to get him to do something he doesn't want to do). Finally we got a counsellor set up for her who she's been seeing on a weekly basis for the past 18 months. The counsellor suggested that my sister take cipralex (lexapro). The therapy and the medication have made a significant positive difference for my sister. I then helped my sister find a volunteer job as an information desk clerk at the local hospital, which she worked weekly up until last September. The job was great for her for a number of reasons. It provided her with a great form of non-threatening social interaction, gave her some responsibility, a bit of a purporse etc. Things changed unfortunately when September rolled around and my parents decided it would be best for my sister to attend a prestigious private school. She was extremely nervous about this school, as was I. I thought it was a terrible idea for a number of reasons. The school was tougher, it had a reputation for being cliquey etc. No one listened to me though and my dad told me "everything would work out great."
Things did not work out great. She dropped out after three months and is now staying home again everyday doing nothing.
I'm trying to get her into a special government run social anxiety group for teens, but there's a wait list and it could still be a little while before she gets accepted.
I recently had a talk with my dad about him needing to do more to help my sister out. This is pretty much what he told me:
- She needs to figure things out on her own
- Why don't you do things for her (I told him I was and he told me that he thought I was getting her into some special group, but I obviously failed at doing that)
- It's all our alcoholic mom's fault
- I was just venting at him because I was mad at our alcoholic mom
So, my question is, what can I do:
A) To help my sister out
B) Do about my dad
Thanks for reading!!
My little sister, unfortunately, suffers from severe social anxiety. She no longer goes to school because of this. She is 16 years old.
She spends her days at home watching cartoons, and browsing sites like reddit or stumble upon. She is bored out of her mind.
Both our parents suck. Our mom is a somewhat functioning alcoholic that puts a huge strain on the family. Our dad, on the other hand, doesn't play nearly a big enough of a part in our lives as he should. He does everything in his power to not involve himself with us, conflict, family issues etc. He'd rather shove a problem under the rug than deal with it, or better yet, dump it on someone else and run.
About a year and a half ago I approached my dad and told him I was really concerned with my sister being depressed, not attending school etc.
He told me "she'd snap out of it" and that everything would be fine in the end. I told him I didn't think so and forced him to find her a counsellor for her to see. He told me he didn't know how (typical response from him when you try to get him to do something he doesn't want to do). Finally we got a counsellor set up for her who she's been seeing on a weekly basis for the past 18 months. The counsellor suggested that my sister take cipralex (lexapro). The therapy and the medication have made a significant positive difference for my sister. I then helped my sister find a volunteer job as an information desk clerk at the local hospital, which she worked weekly up until last September. The job was great for her for a number of reasons. It provided her with a great form of non-threatening social interaction, gave her some responsibility, a bit of a purporse etc. Things changed unfortunately when September rolled around and my parents decided it would be best for my sister to attend a prestigious private school. She was extremely nervous about this school, as was I. I thought it was a terrible idea for a number of reasons. The school was tougher, it had a reputation for being cliquey etc. No one listened to me though and my dad told me "everything would work out great."
Things did not work out great. She dropped out after three months and is now staying home again everyday doing nothing.
I'm trying to get her into a special government run social anxiety group for teens, but there's a wait list and it could still be a little while before she gets accepted.
I recently had a talk with my dad about him needing to do more to help my sister out. This is pretty much what he told me:
- She needs to figure things out on her own
- Why don't you do things for her (I told him I was and he told me that he thought I was getting her into some special group, but I obviously failed at doing that)
- It's all our alcoholic mom's fault
- I was just venting at him because I was mad at our alcoholic mom
So, my question is, what can I do:
A) To help my sister out
B) Do about my dad
Thanks for reading!!
