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Forgive me if this is the wrong board. When I was little I had strict asian parents so basically I had to spend most of my time studying even during the summer. I couldn't socialize with my classmates outside of school and so I found new friends....happy meals and video games. As I grew older I got fatter and fatter and preferred socializing on video game forums rather then talking to other kids outside of school. I started getting crappier and crappier grades because I would care about posting threads on the video game forum I went to instead of doing my homework. I would stay up late and this would contribute to my weight gain even more because I had no energy for gym class.

I remember this girl I liked too in 7th grade who started aiming, but they were sarcastically making fun of me (you know what I'm talking about). It's better now though. In high school I made friends because I had friends I knew from middle school and I decided to join the wrestling team because I love martial arts (I took Kung Fu classes twice a week and that was my escape from school and my parents). I got more confident, but I was still fat and this mean kid was bullying me so I started working out more and more. Another fact that drove me was that my parents paid for me to go to this private school so I could get my grades up so I didn't want to disappoint them since they really mellowed up.

Now it's better because I'm not fat anymore, my grades are better, and I'm good friends with the girl that teased me (hey she was 7th grade back then!). I actually like social events if I know a majority of the people there now too. I actually think if you're in deep stages of SAS and get out of them one step at a time you get more empathy. Only problem I got now is that I'm scared I forgot how to make new friends with college approaching on the horizon. Sorry if it's tldr. D=
 

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Be your own hero
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761 Posts
Several traumatic events happening in a short period of time.
Sensitive kid got minor bullying.
Low self esteem.
 

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Manic Hispanic
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5,406 Posts
Bullied in elementary school,moved from california to kansas near the beginning of 4th grade,went to another elementary school for 2 months,moved to a more permanent school for the rest of 4th and 5th grade,but i was already quiet by then,had to change to middle school,moved houses again and went to a different middle school for 7th grade,leaving my small group of 6th grade friends behind,went to another school that starts at 8th grade,stayed quiet all throughout the year.Also when i was younger and tried building something my parents would always have to point out why it wouldn't work instead of letting me find out
 

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Kafkaesque
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Largely genetics, I guess. Even when I was five years old I was enchanted by books and arts but couldn't stand physical activities and always felt uncomfortable around people. Elementary school was a veritable hell because pretty much everyone scared me to death ; I was just too shy, quiet, timid and effeminate. I often feigned illness to avoid school because I was morbidly afraid of raucous classmates and their violent behavior. Many kids liked me a bit because I always acted nice, but I was too withdrawn to make proper friends. Also, because I was pathetically skinny and fragile, mean boys loved to play pranks on me, and I became very neurotic and disturbed. On top of that, my parents and teachers disapproved of my introverted personality and forced me to socialize, which led to a number of traumatic events. I was happy only when I was alone. I developed weird suspicion that all people hated me ; I remember asking my mother "Do you love me? Really? Really?" ad nauseam till she flipped out.

Then came middle school. I was plunged into a deluge of bullying and identity crisis and my life degenerated into a protracted nightmare. It was disaster after disaster. I was extremely unstable, gloomy and taciturn. I resorted to self-harm to preserve my sanity, fiercely resented myself and often went perilously close to suicide. Fortunately, I was far more intelligent than most of my peers, so I was able to retain excellent grades, but the rest was all pain and misery. It's a miracle that I managed to get out of that dark period.
 

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My alcoholic Father left when I was five, which caused our family to become very poor. Deadbeat Dad laws weren't in effect back then...and he fled 2000 miles away beyond our reach.

I loved my Dad, his leaving had a profound effect on me, love turned to hate. Couple that with poverty and the teasing that comes with being a poor kid and there you have it.

Also, I have dysgraphia, so my handwriting to this day is nearly illegible and I have no artistic talent (other than origami, strangely). I was terribly teased by teachers and children alike in elementary school and unable to complete and succeed at schoolwork which led to bad grades. I also had a very terrible temper, and got into a lot of fights.

When you hate society as completely as I have and then you recover there's a sort of guilt that remains. You feel like people will see through you when you talk to them.
 

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I grew up in a somewhat reclusive household. My mom wouldn't allow me to stay over at a friend's, do any afterschool activities, etc. We didn't go out and do anything as a family, either, everyone just sat around (quietly) in their own rooms. After high school, I lived with my dad and stepmom where I was free to do things as I pleased, but by then I felt too awkward. It's ten years later and I haven't gotten a whole lot better. I try hard to let the kids be involved in the activities of their choosing and encourage interaction because I don't want them to turn out like me. I have no doubt that my anxiety is a product of my upbringing. I was never bullied or ridiculed, just too shy to make friends. As I got older, I had even less friends... who wants to hang out at school with the teenager who isn't allowed to leave their house or have friends over?
 

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low self esteem, moving to another state, living in a rich town full of douche bags who put down anyone who doesn't have as much money as them. or their parents i should say. those are the reasons i think i have social anxiety but there is probably more to it.
 
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