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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm just saying hi. I have a lot to say but I'm not sure how much I should say now....on second thought I'm going to rant for a bit.

It feels like my life is losing momentum. I don't see a point in getting up, going outside, trying hard at work, or to do anything really. It's such a social world I can't find joy in living alone. I can't seem to figure how to stop being alone.

I have social anxiety or avoidant personality disorder or something like that. I could go to therapy but I don't see the point. Basically I feel ugly, have low self esteem, and don't open up because of that. Even if I start to talk to people and be friendly I usually stop myself because I'm afraid of what they are thinking about me.

I just can't delude myself into thinking that my appearance doesn't matter. Kids called me names when I was younger, said mean/hateful things when I was a teenager, and now that I'm an adult am I to believe that it doesn't matter?! And now on occasion people will say something even today that makes me question what they are thinking. Awhile back someone said (in a friendly way) "you kind of look like the Joker." That's great if I'm trying to blow up all the hospitals in town but I don't see that's going to get me a date.

I know my personality is more my problem than anything physical. I just can't seem to change my personality if I really think I am ugly.

Is there such a thing as ugly? The word exist, as well as the word beauty. What we consider ugly is usually those that have weaker genetic traits. Genetically inferior. Do those people have a right to exist, to carry on their traits to the next generation. What about evolution?

I've said enough already. It all seems like too much. I just don't feel lucky. :|
 

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Hey FelixtheCat welcome. :)
 

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Hi,welcome to:sas
 

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:wel
 

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Welcome, FelixTheCat! :)
 
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