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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi- I had a second date tonight and came away angry at myself for having to try so hard to lead the conversation. It's nothing new and I can stumble through it, but it is really difficult for me and I feel as if I am faking my way through it. I know what many of you mean by going blank and shutting down. I have spent much of my social existence dealing with that and feeling stupid because of it. I also have severe ADHD and forgetfulness. Relationships seem impossible. I have some great friends, but I find myself reacting and never leading conversation. Whats worse is that I home in to my deficiencies while trying to make conversation and distract myself. It feels as if I am in here somewhere but unable to tap in to who I am and how I feel. Occasionally I do tap in and it's the best feeling in the world.
 

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
Apologies

After reading some posts I realize that perhaps a second date seems like an achievement and perhaps I shouldn't complain, but I am also older than most of whom I've seen here thus far and therefore, perhaps, better at faking it. I can say that SAS is something that hasn't worked itself out for me and has been a problem since sometime around the age of 13. I am 44. I have worked out short term, temporary ways of dealing with it, but in the long run, it always catches me and leaves me unraveled. I say this to make the point that you should deal with this in every way possible, now and you have the advantage of finding support among peers on this site. I don't know that I will ever fix it for myself, but I am glad to be here with others that are dealing with the same issues I have dealt with for so long and I will offer any help that I can. I doubt I will here anything here that I haven't struggled with, so hopefully we can turn this into a strength and a tool to help.
 

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Welcome, AgeOfConan! :)
 
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