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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My name is Jessica, I'm 21, and I live in Tampa, Fl with my two sons, Ian and Ethan. I've been battling with SD for about 13ish years and I just recently sought out help for it. Growing up I've always felt weird in my own skin. I would always studder, sweat, turn red, and constantly dwell on things I've said and did in front of others.

Now, after dropping out of highschool, reciveing my GED, and entering an online college (I can't begin to tell you how many days I've missed of public school because of my phobia and how many sleepless nights being terrified of returning the next day), I feel as though my problems are set to remain with me for the rest of my life. This causes a huge problem seeing as how I am a single mother and can't even bring myself to interview for a job.

I like to see myself as a somewhat bright perosn, but I feel absolutely stupid being afraid to even go through the checkout line at a store. I joined this group to get a sense that I wasn't alone with my problems. On that note, I was wondering if anyone has been in this scenario (I haven't seen much SD people talk about these types of feelings).

Sometimes I feel as though I am very sociable, but this occurs rarely and only occurs when I feel that I'm "better" than everyone around me at the time. When I feel anxiety kicking in (worrying about how people see me) I turn into a rude and stuck-up person. This is not me at all, I feel it's a coping mechanism. Basically, I'd rather people view me as unapproachable then to actually have to be in social situations with them.And while I have all the symptoms of SD (and have had it control my life for quite sometime) I am still able to make a complete fool of myself if I get angry. And my anger can be triggered by anything and may whatever deity help the people in the crossfires of whatever "fit" I'm having.Maybe bipolar tendencies? Idk, it runs heavily in my family and I know for sure that I have manic episodes, but I feel as though I could live my whole life bipolar (if that's the case) as long as I get help with this SD. At least with only bipolar disorder I could manage to talk to people.

Anyway, about the REAL me. I enjoy reading and music. I tend to go for media outlets that few people know of because I hate being orignal. That could be becaue I'm an Aquarius:). I'm VERY into astrology (not horoscopes, just astrology) I love watching documetaries and learning new things of intrest. I can bring up many random facts that other people usually wouldn't care to store away in their brains lol And I love spending time with my boys, ages 3 and 1. With that being said, It's nice to meet you all and sorry about my rambling lol.
 

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Hey Jessi, welcome to the site. Noticed you live in Tampa, Im actually thinking about moving there. Also looking at Ft Myers area.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Tampa's a good place to be if you don't mind ALOT of road rage lol. I mean, we have Busch Gardens after all :) Not sure about Ft. Myers, all my life I've lived in this area and never headed that way...
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Ah... then you should be good to go down here
 

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planning relocation
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Yeah. Plus I can't deal with these winters and living in such an expensive state anymore. Just hope job situation down there improves.
 

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Beneath the Surface
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Welcome Jessica! I also dropped out of high school and got my GED in part due my awkwardness.

Hope you enjoy your stay
 

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Welcome, Jessi500! :)
 

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Hey Jessica, welcome to :sas
 

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Add me/PM me, let's talk!
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Hello and welcome to SAS! Hope you are enjoying the forum so far. There are lots of others here who are also in the same social anxiety boat that you have described in your intro post. Everyone here is friendly and very supportive and if you need someone to talk to and would like a friend you can send me a PM on here and a friend request! :)
 
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