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I'm really bad at thinking up usernames and fish food was the first thing in my immediate sight. My name is Rachel though, and I have a beautiful yellow beta named Vincent! I thought his yellow was similar to that commonly used by Van Gogh and since I am an artist as well it seemed like a fitting name for the little guy :)

I am in my second semester of college right now as art major which is both fun and terrifying since I have so much anxiety speaking during critiques :p I'm not exactly sure where I want to go with my art, but I'm leaning towards illustrating children's books or maybe character design/ something that could be applied towards film. I watch a lot of Netflix, I like to go exploring in the forest or at the beach, doing anything crafty or art related is always fun, I love animals and melt into a pile of mush when I see them because they're so cute aaaand I don't really know what else to say about myself.

I guess I decided to try coming to this group because my anxiety has become a monster this past semester and I think I need some new ways of coping with it. I've been wanting to go to my school's health center to speak with a counselor or get prescribed something but it gives me so much anxiety when I think of having to call them to make an appointment. I tried just walking in there once but I pretty much immediately had an anxiety attack and ran out :( It's gotten so hard for me this semester, and I feel so defeated. My grades are horrible because there's classes that I'm too afraid to attend, or too afraid to ask for help. A lot of my worries are stemming from my new (first) job as a cashier/customer service at a pretty big retail store. The phones are constantly ringing and there's so much pressure to push sales and promotions and talk to disgruntled customers, I just don't know if I can keep up with it much longer. I had an anxiety attack at the start of one of my shifts because I was alone and juggling three phone calls and had no idea what to do and I couldn't get it together and had to be sent home, which made my manager mad. Every day I want to quit but I'm already barely making enough money to pay my rent so if I do I have no idea where I'll live. I haven't really been able to make friends up here so I couldn't stay with anyone either.

Bit of a ramble so I apologize. I just feel anxious everywhere I go and don't really have anyone to talk to other than my boyfriend. From the few threads I've looked through so far you all seem really supportive and welcoming, so I think discussing SA on here will help me in learning to handle it better.

Peace!:D
 

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Welcome, FishFood! :)
 

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Hi, Rachel !
Welcome to SAS forums. I bad at making up usernames too lol :b
I tried just walking in there once but I pretty much immediately had an anxiety attack and ran out
You will not regret it when you will overcome your fear, believe me :)
I was very anxious when starting visiting my psychologist too, but thank God I did it. Now things are moving in the positive direction, I am more happy with what I am doing with my life.
 

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Hey I know how you feel. My first year at college was heavily angst ridden. And the first job I ever had I quit because of the same issues. But you've come to the right place. Welcome to SAS!

(P.S. So long and thanks for all the fishfood!) :)
 
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