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I'm an 18 year old senior in high school. I have never seen a therapist and I've never been diagnosed with any type of disorder. However, I am eager to discuss some of my personal issues and problems on this site, which relate to social anxiety.

I think I fit some of the criteria for avoidant personality disorder and I am sometimes unnecessarily judgmental and critical of myself. I care way too much about what others think of me and I am obsessed with my image/persona, as it appears to other people. I used to have a very tight group of friends, but near the beginning of my high school years I self-isolated myself. I stopped returning phone calls, declined invitations to parties, and eventually my friends gave up on me completely.

Now, I sit at home on the weekends and though I do enjoy being by myself and independent, I can't help but feel like something is wrong in my life. I have a lot of "school friends," if you know what I mean, but since I cut myself off from my old friends, I've never attempted to hang out with anyone else.

I have trouble understanding myself. I'm outgoing, curious and pleasant by nature. I love meeting new people and talking to strangers. But, for some reason, I'm deathly afraid of going to parties with people I know, where I'm afraid I'll make a fool of myself. I hate going to large gatherings and every time I'm in the hallways at school I feel like I'm being constantly judged and watched by others.

I will graduate in a couple of weeks and I'm going to college next year, where I hopefully can start a "new life." I am excited, nervous and eager all at the same time. But I think that's normal.

Anyway, I'm glad I found this place. I look forward to talking with you guys!

-MrE
 

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Hey mre314 :wels
 

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Welcome, MRE314! :)
 
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