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I have 2 close friends who are really nice people. Sometimes I just want to tell them everything about my SA because I can't take it alone. But then sometimes I feel that I shouldn't tell them because I am afraid that they won't understand and just tell me to 'toughen it up'. I don't know if I am overestimating their responses or if they will actually respond to me like that. I know for sure that if I do tell them, I'm gonna be balling my eyes out because this is a sensitive issue to me. I don't know what to do.
Have you guys ever told your friends about your SA? How did they respond?
 

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Naw i don't ever talk about it with people. It would be way too uncomfortable to talk to someone about. I really don't see the point either, if you don't have it then i doubt you'd be able to understand it. My friends just think of me as shy, which is fine with me
 

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Ah yes. I've only discussed my SA with two people thus far and I didn't feel like either understood and I got very anxious trying to explain it. I felt they both approached it with the attitude that this was something I could be rid of easily - to just "face my fears" and essentially place myself in uncomfortable situations to get used to them.

The second person I told actually said, "Oh, and I always just thought you were a b****" before trying to backtrack and explain that he loved my personality, but that I could be harsh with people. This response has really upset me because I hate to think that it's the impression I give.

Anways, I hope this doesn't discourage you from telling your friends. In my experience it hasn't gone well (these people were actually family), but I have one more person I want to discuss it with and maybe I'll have a better story to tell about that experience. Good luck with whatever you decide peachteax3!
 
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I've mentioned it to a good friend or two, one who didn't understand what the heck I was on about and the other was quite empathetic, thank goodness...but they didn't really take it very seriously and I also made light of the issues...it's impossible to talk about it to people who haven't been through similar stuff, they just sit there with their judgey little eyes and blank faces wondering w-t-f. I've gone to some websites though and talked about it to a lot of people online who also have anxiety issues etc and it's been a massive help. I like the anonymity of online discussions, you can be 100% honest and not have to worry about gossip or a tarnished reputation.
 

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I've only told two people. One person was a friend I had from Year 7 to Year 10 (basically 7th Grade to 10th Grade). After I moved schools at the end of Year 10 I hardly saw him again. We now go to the same university so I might see him around now and again, but it's really awkward. We just say hi to each other and keep going our separate ways. The other person is my girlfriend and she's just about the only person who understands me.
 

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I somewhat disagree with what most people say here. Although, I know some one can't understand it without feeling it, I think most people can empathize. When I explain it to people I try to relate it to one of their fears, such as a roach walking up one's arm. You know its not rational to think the roach is going to do much, if any, damage to you, but you still have that increased constant awareness and creepy fearful feeling. Really why would any body be afraid of a roach... You will always win the fight.
 

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When I explain it to people I try to relate it to one of their fears, such as a roach walking up one's arm. You know its not rational to think the roach is going to do much, if any, damage to you, but you still have that increased constant awareness and creepy fearful feeling. Really why would any body be afraid of a roach... You will always win the fight.
:lol That's such a good way to put it!

I feel that sometimes instead of trying to understand people are quick to relate - "oh yeah I'm shy sometimes too" and I find this incredibly frustrating.
 

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My brother and I have talked about it somewhat and I suppose my father knows to a degree. I think they at least attempt to understand, which is nice.

It's possible that a select few other people know too, but I don't think I've outright told them.
 

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For the people who have told others, how do you find they respond? Are you telling people you consider true friends or acquaintances? I assume its the former but I don't know.

Given how most people think of SA (at least how I perceive most people think) I'm having trouble conceiving of how it would help. Certain people (bosses if its effecting work, teachers if school etc.) I could see telling, but it would have to be very specific, practically dire, circumstances.

I really need to use parentheticals less.
 

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Last time I told someone I had any problem whether it be SA or depression or something miniscule...they said, "Lee, I don't want to hear about your stuff, most people don't want to hear your problems, so it's probably best to keep that **** to yourself..." and man was she right...
 

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For the people who have told others, how do you find they respond? Are you telling people you consider true friends or acquaintances? I assume its the former but I don't know.
I haven't outright told any people who would be considered friends/acquaintances, but I might have hinted at it. I had a lengthy conversation about various subjects with my ex's brother (who I never really got on with until then). I sorta let him know about it, and he was pretty understanding. He even gave me a few pointers about how I should carry myself, although he thought I was in good shape for the most part.

My brother was understanding as well. Enough to ask me some detailed questions too. He's very outgoing and can get things done (so it's nice to have him around now), so he was trying to assist me here and there. Both my father and brother agree that I should go through with seeing a therapist on trying to resolve my issues.

I really need to use parentheticals less.
Same here. I may have you beat though. I do it in a big percentage of my posts, haha.
 

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My issues with social anxiety caused me to develop agoraphobia, which made it obvious to anyone who cared about me that something wasn't right. Since that happened, I've explained that I have an anxiety/panic disorder...I just leave the "social" out of it.
Anxiety disorder sounds okay...social anxiety disorder sounds...dirty. :|
 

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I've told 3 friends about my depression and the first time I cried when I told my mate, I was quite drunk every time. Sometimes it makes me cringe to think I cried in front of a mate.
 

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I tell those who need to know, and those I want to know. Which amounts to my family (hard not to know, though only my Dad really gets it because he's had a similar problem), and a couple of close friends. My longest-standing best friend (who I'm actually having problems with, but that's another story), knows but can't possibly understand, as she has become my opposite in many ways.

However - my other closest friend, a fantastic gem of a girl who I only discovered a couple of years ago, knows full well, because she has similar problems herself. In fact, it's largely thanks to SA that we hit it off so well, because it gave us a major thing in common. From the day I told her, we couldn't stop talking to each other, it was great. So I do have SA to thank for that, at least :) Small miracles, eh?

When meeting new people (which I naturally try not to do), I suss them out a bit first, and depending on what they're like I'll tell them "I'm shy", or will just not tell them anything. Some accept it, some relate, a few lose patience and drift off back into life.
 

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Yeah, I guess I've told most people about it in one form or another. I have friends with anxiety issues, so it's not like it's a big deal. I don't usually announce HEY EVERYBODY I HAVE SOCIAL ANXIETY, but I'll talk about how things give me anxiety or whatever.

I don't know, it doesn't seem like that big a deal to me. I feel like it's already pretty visible that I have anxiety problems, and doesn't seem like some kind of big surprise when I talk about it.
 

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I told this one person but they didn't take it seriously because they were the ultimate extrovert, and were like "everyone gets nervous sometimes." Needless to say, I was sorry for admitting it because now they probably think of me as the chick with the "problem."
 
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