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Discussion Starter #1
I've always loved music so going to concerts is always something I've wanted to do. Yet time has gotten away and I still have never been to a single concert despite my SA. Just wondering from you all:

1) Have you overcome your SA long enough to go to any, if so, who did you see?
2) Did you feel out of place or were you able to enjoy it and how?
3) Would you have any advice for someone with SA who's never been? (example, did you feel you needed to act a certain way or anything to fit in).
 

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Yes, but I don't think the type of concerts I've been to have been that scary--nothing particularly rowdy, and I've almost always had a seat, so I didn't have to deal with others much. I feel out of place pretty much anywhere.
 

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I actually think it was better then seeing a movie anxiety wise at least for me. I've only been to two concerts and had two very different experiences. One I saw the Killers and was at a really nice venue with seating and everything. Although when the concert started no one ever sat down lol. So that one was orderly and normally.

The other one was to see Bayside which was in a really run down place. And to be honest was kind of scary. There were huge moshpits, shady looking people, and it just reaked of smoke. It was also so hot the walls were dripping. All that kind of made it more fun then the killer's concert though. I really liked the energy of being with all those people in the pit too. I'm not a big fan of either band though. The only concerts I have oppurtunities to go to are bands all my friends like.

You don't really have to worry about acting a certain way. I also got caught up in the energy of the show and actly felt more comfortable then at most things. I didn't really feel out of place because of this. Plus everyone is paying attention to the band not you. If you have the oppurtunity to go you should take it. Especially if you get to see bands you actually like lol.
 

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I've gone to a bunch of concerts over the past few years...it's hard to go alone though, especially when I have to travel a long distance.
 

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Equilibrian Epicurius
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At every concert I've been to, everyone is focused on either the band or a group of friends they've brought along with them. Seriously, no one will even notice that you're there.
 

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Yes, but honestly, I can only force myself to do it for my favorite band. They are the only ones I have seen really. I have gone 3 times, but even though I love them, it takes a lot to get me through it... and that is with my husband along to calm me down. Once the music starts I am fine because no one is looking at me, but before the show, when the lights are on, or just after- that is really difficult.
 

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I've been to concerts a plenty actually. In all truths, that's where I feel the most comfortable. It feels like my SA just goes away because of the passion for music that I feel. Waiting in line is fun too, just because everyone loves the band just as much as you do and you can easily talk with them. From my own experiences, people just tend to be nice since yer all suffering together as you wait.

Also, I hate seats at shows and prefer to be front and center. That's the only way to go for me, but then again, I like to be able to see the band and really feel the music. But there's no specific "way" you have to act, since as everyone said, people are way too focused on the band. You can dance and sing to your heart's content. People are there just to see a show.

Hmm...bands I've seen? Well, I've seen Weezer three times, Pixies [super amazing], and recently, Travis [two days in a row]!
 

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She-Wolf
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I've always loved music so going to concerts is always something I've wanted to do. Yet time has gotten away and I still have never been to a single concert despite my SA. Just wondering from you all:

1) Have you overcome your SA long enough to go to any, if so, who did you see?
2) Did you feel out of place or were you able to enjoy it and how?
3) Would you have any advice for someone with SA who's never been? (example, did you feel you needed to act a certain way or anything to fit in).
1) noo i'm far from overcoming SA, i've just found methods to cope. i go to concerts both alone or with others. recent shows i've seen: animal collective, acid mothers temple, holy ****, akron/family. i have some coming up these next few weeks too.
2) i often feel a bit awkward but when i get in i usually get a drink which helps a little and find a spot to wait until the band starts (and have another drink). usually once the music starts i can forget about it enough to enjoy the show.
3) nah, you definiten' don't have to act a certain way to fit in. though there are the type of bands who have a specific audience but its still pretty varied so i wouldn't worry about that.
remind yourself that everyone is there for the music. it might seem like everyone is socializing before but once the band goes on people forget and just pay attention to the music and the stage.
also there are always people alone at shows, if that's what you are worried about. in some places there are less but thats not that big of a deal. if someone ever asks just be like "well, none of my friends like this band enough to see them..".

i love going to concerts and i usually do it alone. it's not scary and SA-wise it really isn't as bad as some think it is. you should really try it out! might be hard at first but you;''l end up enjoying yourself :)
 

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Buried at Sea
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Like everyone says, once the band starts no one is going to be paying attention to anything else. I tend to go to concerts on my own because 1) I have no friends, and 2) the friends I do have don't like my music. I find that club shows are usually better than theatre/seated concerts for going alone, because everyone is just standing around, and if you feel awkward in one spot, you go stand in another.

If someone does end up talking to me at a concert, I tell them that none of my friends would come with me, but I loved the band so much I came anyway. I've found that people tend to think that's pretty cool.
 

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between bands can be bad, especially if you're alone. i usually just end up standing in one spot listening to the music they play on the speakers praying for the next band to hurry up while spacing everyone else out. havent had to go alone that many times though

also depends on the layout of the place. if its all ground, there's always guys in the back standing alone chilling where you can blend in. never been to a place with seating alone
 

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Geese
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Been to two big ones and a few little club gigs. The lead up is always 100x worse than when I'm actually there I find as I get into the vibe of things once the gig has started. But I find the lead up to one of these is usually some of the worse anxiety I go through.
 

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herp derp
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At every concert I've been to, everyone is focused on either the band or a group of friends they've brought along with them. Seriously, no one will even notice that you're there.
Yup :)
Nobody looks twice at you which is why SA's never stopped me going to crowded places such as concerts.
 

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I've been to 2 big concerts and 1 small one in a bar. I had someone with me for all 3 of them. Strangely the little bar one was the most uncomfortable. Maybe because I was standing and it was packed pretty tight? I took some Valium for that. The other two concerts were in an arena and I was seated.
 

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Geese
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yeah problem with those small bar gigs is it can get very claustrophobic and you can feel suffocated, not what you want when you are anxious, it's panic attack central.
 

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First concert I went to I absolutely hated. I didn't like the bands and I was stuck in the mosh pit without any shoes (they fell off and got absorbed in the crowd.)

Second concert I chose a much better place to stand which was right near the stairs. I drank loads of beer this time and was there with my best friends. I loved this concert! Also the bands were better.
 

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Yes, and that was great. At first i felt very nervous because i thought everybody would stare at me because i was only one who had come alone but people barely even noticed me. They were just came to listen to music.
You should go to the concert in spite of your SA. It's definitely worth it.
 

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I like going to concerts. Now, I usually buy two tickets and convince a friend to go. My friends don't really have the same musical tastes as I do, but it's a free show for them, so they usually go. But back when I didn't have friends, I still went to concerts. My anxiety is rarely an issue at a concert, everyone is so focused on the band. Even if you're forced to make small talk, it's much easier because you can talk about the band ("I thought that 'single C' was one of the best tracks, they really shouldn't have released 'single B' first, it had me worried about the direction of the new album etc. etc. etc.")
 

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Discussion Starter #19
But there's no specific "way" you have to act, since as everyone said, people are way too focused on the band. You can dance and sing to your heart's content. People are there just to see a show.
That's the part I have the most problem with in terms of SA. I seriously doubt, even if I was drunk, that I could dance and sing at a concert. The concerts you see on tv or youtube of course always show people going nuts, dancing, singing, yelling...and those are the images I have in my head when I think about going to a concert.

I even have trouble going to football games. I've been to several in college and the nfl, but I never feel comfortable doing anything more than applauding if there's a big play. And of course in football, everyone wants to be loud and support their team on defense. People brag about their sore throats the next day like its some sort of rite of passage. If I'm alone at home I get pretty loud, but just can't do it at a game.

As simple as it seems, if I could ever yell, sing or dance at a concert or game, I'd feel like I had accomplished something.
 

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Whether I dance or not really depends on the crowd. When I saw Los Campesinos (small indiepop band), it was a really small show and I felt really comfortable and so I danced my little heart out. Same when I saw The Faint and Interpol. But if it's a huge crowd and people are being annoying and everyone's just *standing* there, I won't dance.
 
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