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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I never have any reason to actually go out anywhere. I think i could be bipolar because i worry about my image, and never feel comfortable with what i wear.

I guess it could be agoraphobia too.

But yeah, i dont know what to do/where to go, and i'm stuck at home all the time.

What on earth can i do? The only time i really go out is to see my councillor....:|
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Those are depressive thoughts: no reason to go out, don't know where to go, what to do, etc. It could be that your anxiety has led you into depression. Have you mentioned these thoughts to your counselor?
ALL the time. They seem to make me go in circles, before sending me to someone else. I'm on to my 3rd councillor since i was 19. I'm 21 now.

I am definitely depressed, because almost everyone my age i know brags about what they have etc. And it makes me feel awful. I can't do what everyone else can.

I have no real point of going anywhere. Especially not on my own.

All i want is a few close friends and a girlfriend. But the problem is that i would have to go out all the time in uncomfortable situations. Plus to get a girl i'd have to act like a complete jerk (as it seems most guys i know that have girls are idiots).

Anyway, thanks for the input, i appreciate any help from anyone. I'm so alone!
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Yes, that's exactly right. What are you doing to get over your discomfort?
Nothing yet. I am waiting on my next appointment. There was talk of "exposure therapy" (when you have to go out for a certain amount of time, and gradually get more used to it).

But i cant see how that is going to work. Because i have worked in a busy town centre serving customers etc. And having to walk to and from work when all the secondary school kids were walking. I never got used to that, my anxiety just kept getting worse.

Its like the only way i will feel any better, is if the pressure of finding a partner etc was gone.

Its absolutely impossible. I dont think its possible to me to find love ever!
 

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Well I have to disagree with you. It's not impossible for you to find love. That's your depression talking and it just doesn't think straight. As long as you are working on your challenges all possibilities are open to you. I have been exactly where you are and I was convinced I would never find love. I was wrong.

Good luck with the graduated exposure therapy. It will be much different from your experience walking through town. The first step may be as small as imagining you are going outside. The idea is to provoke a tiny bit of anxiety, then conquer it with relaxation techniques. This way you gradually build up to the full situation.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Well I have to disagree with you. It's not impossible for you to find love. That's your depression talking and it just doesn't think straight. As long as you are working on your challenges all possibilities are open to you. I have been exactly where you are and I was convinced I would never find love. I was wrong.

Good luck with the graduated exposure therapy. It will be much different from your experience walking through town. The first step may be as small as imagining you are going outside. The idea is to provoke a tiny bit of anxiety, then conquer it with relaxation techniques. This way you gradually build up to the full situation.
Its hard for me to believe things that are positive. I can be very stubborn about ideas that councillors give me, because i cant see them working.

Just thinking about going out causes me anxiety.

Anyway, i'm thankful that you believe its just my depression that is making me fail.

I just cannot see a future for myself right now. And working on getting out feels alien to me.
 

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Sounds like me...I only ever really go somewhere if I have an appointment with my therapist. But sometimes I think I'd like to go somewhere, maybe the library, but I can't...not alone. I consider myself to be an agoraphobic, although it's not panic attacks I fear, just something bad happening and never being able to get back home. I also don't feel really independent.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Sounds like me...I only ever really go somewhere if I have an appointment with my therapist. But sometimes I think I'd like to go somewhere, maybe the library, but I can't...not alone. I consider myself to be an agoraphobic, although it's not panic attacks I fear, just something bad happening and never being able to get back home. I also don't feel really independent.
Yes, i get this kind of feeling when i have been out in the past. Its worse if i've had to go too far away from home, when passing a group of people, and during the evening.
 

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I sit at home all day too. I've been forcing myself to change recently, though. After so many years of this, therapy being ineffective, and no one seeming to be able to help me, I was despairing for a long time, thinking I was beyond help.

Recently I just got way too sick of it. Sick of crying almost every day, sick of those awful mornings and awful late nights. I had never been able to find help...so I decided to stop looking for it, and do the only alternative: help myself.

If there's one thing I learned over all this time, it's that I'm deluding myself if I think that doing the same thing over and over is going to give me a different result than the last time. Staying at home is the one place where no one else is, and where any change is the least likely to happen. So I decided to force change, I didn't care WHAT change. I just figured that if I kept throwing myself into different situations, then maybe, just maybe, something good would come up.

I tried isolating myself from society, which was a horrible idea. Then I forced myself to go exercise and jogging. I forced myself to get a job. I forced myself to move no matter how hard it was because I only had two choices:

Suffer, and move, or suffer, and don't move.

My choice was obvious. I refuse to let this take me over anymore. I'm going to beat this, no matter how much it hurts or how lonely I feel. Because if I don't...nobody else is going to beat this for me.

On that note, I still cry a lot, but at least I cry and walk at the same time now.
 
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