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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I am getting too old to not be in relationships. It's part of being human, part of being alive. You learn through them and then you get to the point where you are in one that lasts. It's all pretty simple. The most f'd up people I know are in relationships. I just can't initate things. I'm bored quite often. Couples have each other people. I just have other people and that's not enough because it's only sometimes. I'm socially anxious but I like company, especially that of a woman. It's about time I have a girlfriend.
 

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I feel ya man- at this point I don't even need friends so much, mostly I just want a gf. But I don't see it happening and if it does I don't think it would last- who wants to date someone with no friends or anything, right?
 

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I know how you feel. I used to be so hopeful and optimistic about having a relationship, now I've lost that optimism and half given up. It almost feels pointless to worry about it anymore, but my want of a significant other is stronger than ever. It's very frustrating.
 

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meh i just need to get laid for a couple of weeks to get rid of that deprived feeling then i can on and be happy with the single life.

trust me benice after you do get into a relationship and the intimacy part of it starts to get old all that other boring **** that goes along with relationships will seem like a ****ing horror movie and you ll wish you were single again.
 

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BENICE, What is your situation? Do you leave the house? Do you go to parties or are part of a social club at school? People think that being in a club at school is for nerds but that is crap. I joined the philosophy club in college and that was an amazing experience. I met some people that I never would have met if I didn't go. Plus you meet some girls that are hot and smart so that is a plus

You don't have to say one liners and be cool. Just be nice and don't try too hard to be amazingly funny or overconfident. That will become annoying to people. It is really only practice that can help. I think that is all it takes. Also you can't be other people. You can only be you. If your friends give you **** for being yourself, they are not your friends.

I know that this all sounds dumb but it really is about frame of mind. You can do it. Just take baby steps. You don't have to walk right up to a girl you don't know at all and just ask her out point blank(unless you want to). Sometimes that can intimidate them not because of what you said but because it's only natural for people to not trust strangers.

I guess in the end, just wing it. Like I said this is probably not good advice but I'm telling you right now. I can't live your life. Only you can live it. So make it an amazing one. I am being serious. You have to take risks. Not just dating but everything. So if your going to take risks, then do amazing things and have fun.

Also don't beat yourself up for not having a girlfriend. You shouldn't be so critical of yourself. There is this whole forum full of probably thousands of people with the same problem. Good luck.
 

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Whitesnake's advice is really good.

If you're like me though then you might have an subconscious desire to thoroughly experience failure and barrenness.

In that case you're screwed unless you learn to stop caring so much and taking things too seriously.

Make a deal with yourself and write up a contract.

If I do/have done _______ then I deserve to have a gf.

Sign it and complete it.

Carry it around in your pocket/wallet everywhere you go and remind yourself that you're owed it.

Opportunities will begin to present themselves and you won't have to empty your net or sabotage yourself any longer.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
BENICE, What is your situation? Do you leave the house? Do you go to parties or are part of a social club at school?
[\QUOTE]

I have a fairly active social life. I basically have somewhere to go at least every Monday night. I am just quiet there and keep to myself like a creep.
 

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Well I don't know what to say. But I hope you find someone.

Are you depressed? Maybe you are just uninterested and haven't had any luck.

Do something that makes you happy. Learn a skill or activity. Art or building things.

That sounds lame but I'm just trying to help.
 
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