Hi there I am new here. I ve been dealing with social anxiety most of my life that it has led me to live a pretty solitary life up until now. I just turned 40. It’s easier for me to live this way since I avoid dealing with people. I can manage dealing with small things like going out to a store or just saying hi to a stranger walking by them. It’s hard for me though when I have to be around the same people constantly though. Unfortunately for me Iam disibility because of some traumatic things that happened to me in the past. Right now there is a friend of my moms that is staying at our place. I hate when people I don’t know really well come into my space. To me my home is my sanctuary a place to escape to. Anyways this person is here for the time being and I feel like Iam freaking out a bit. I feel awkward and uncomfortable. I mostly hide away in the basement (yes I am living with my mom because of my disability). But I can’t completely avoid this person. It’s tiring to present myself as someone different to her it’s like I have to act around her. And I noticed that she notices that Iam uncomfortable around her and I feel guilty and embarrassed because of that. I am afraid to make eye contact so I am always acting weird around her, it’s torture man. I am also like this around my sister in law and brother in law too.Unless your not immediate family I tend to to feel uncomfortable around them. Anyways this has been my world for a long time I ve kind of accepted the fact that I ain’t no social butterfly and I am fine with it I’ll continue to live a solitary life because it just easier than having to deal with people all the time but it’s not ideal. That’s just a little about me and my little rant. I am just tired of feeling like crap around people especially when they come into my space.