[broncstomper]

:noHelp! I am new here and worried I have a social disorder. I have a big problem with eye contact especially with women. Men are just easier to talk to and to maintain eye contact with. This problem started a few years ago, but it seems to be getting worse. Some days are better than others. Sometimes it seems like it barely bothers me, other days it seems like a huge problem.

I try to look someone in the eye but i don't want to seem rude by turning away completely, so my eyes go down to a womens "parts" and sometimes the same on men but not as bad. I am in NO way attracted to women, but I'm afraid they think I am because I can't hold eye contact. Sometimes I can but it takes alot of concentration. It is worse in bigger groups, I like to be in a small group. After I'm around someone for a long amount of time it usually goes away. I try to concentrate on looking everyone in just the eye, but sometimes it just doesn't work.

Some people I'm just more comfortable around and I don't have this problem with. Like my boyfriend for example I'm around him so much it doesn't affect me, and a couple friends. It affects me alot when I meet new people, haven't been around someone for awhile, or when I'm in a big group. I will avoid eye contact altogether to avoid looking at the wrong "Part
:no

 

[Stop Staring]

I am not one for eye contact myself, but I can force myself for short periods of time. Someone told me one time to look right between their eyes so your staring at what a uni-brow would be. I have been caught looking at a woman's breasts, but luckily she wore a necklace so I commented on that so she didn't think I was perverted.

 

[broncstomper]

Thanks! I will try that....and if anyone else has this problem plz let me know how you deal with it. I have been thinking about telling my mom, but I'm embarassed to...

 

[lars]

making eye contact and smiling is really effective, this way if they don't smile back then i know i can turn away and find someone else to talk to. also when the convo slows or an awkward silence appears going back to eye contact and smiling usually causes a nice laugh

 

[Hypnotoad]

I have a horrible time with eye contact. It is difficult for me to force myself to make eye contact, but I try to. When I do, I start to feel really weird and have to look away and start looking all around the room until the bad feelings go away, then I try to make eye contact again, and the whole mess starts over again.

 

[majg]

doesnt it make you go cross eyed, if u looked in the middle of there eyes ?

 

[sugaraddict]

that is a big problem of mine! ruined relationships with men due to that problem...i try my best to just look at the person's eye color and focus on it...thats wut usually help me out.

 

[Stop Staring]

doesnt it make you go cross eyed, if u looked in the middle of there eyes ?

:lolThat's a funny visual.:lol Try it It does seem weird at first, and doesn't work all the time, sometimes.

 

[Gotanonymous]

Hah! Sometimes my eyes wander to breasts or crotches, too! I just completely don't acknowledge it lol. I've done it on accident to some of the manly guys at work.. I'll unintentionally look around and happen to hit the crotch, then I instantly have something very important to do and dash off lol.

 

[RoninDistance]

It happens sometimes. I try hard to keep my eyes where they are supposed to be, but sometimes, they do wander. I simply hope the other person doesn't notice and force myself to look into their eyes once again. In short conversations this is not a problem, but if things drag on, boob city, here I come. :b

 

[amitseh]

friends,

i am too in the same boat....my problem exactly mathes to broncstomper problem...

"....because I will focus in on their breasts if it's a woman since the entire body is in my line of sight...."

How did you find a solution to it...please shareeee..please...

Is there any eye excercise we can do...please we have to act fast and save each other...

 

[mattias]

I really recognize the many problems all of you have. I accidently look at breasts or
crotch, sometimes just when I'm turning around and sometimes when I have what I would call a very unsteady eyecontact and then a thought like this pops up in my head "Don't look at the (e.g) crotch" This has lead to some really awkward situations in the dressing room :/ lol.
Then I've got one more eye related problem, sometimes when I look at someone I tend to stare and when that happends both me and the peoples I "look" at get there eyes open wide. Just like they just got scared. This is my most annoying problem with my eyecontact and really need help on this one.
Would really appreciate some tips, althougt I can try to give some tips I use:
Try to relax.
If something really awkward happends or I have really big problems with my I contact one day(it varies from day to day how much trouble I have) Just say to your self; I don't give a ****. Haha have found this as a really good way to get rid of anxiety.
Look at the mouth from time to time.

 

[syrella]

I have problems with eye contact sometimes too. It's particularly noticeable when I meet someone new or when I have something that I need to think about intently. I have trouble looking at someone when I'm trying to concentrate since I get too much information. As for how to fix it, it sounds like in your case it's anxiety related. Maybe addressing the anxiety somehow will help? Also, as for "where to stare", maybe try staring at the middle of the eyes as someone suggested? If that's too much, then there are always features like the nose, the mouth, or the neck. Dunno if that'd come across as weird, but you could give it a try.

 

[vnmvenkat]

unable to hold eye contact with strangers and especially ladies.

 

[DAM71392]

i find its harder to have long eye contact with women cuz i find most of em all attractive so i tend to look at their body too sometimes when im talkin to them but they dont mind lol

 

[BarryLyndon]

When I am in a restaurant or public setting, I will sometimes accidently make eye contact with a stranger. And from there it all goes down from there. Its like they know we are locked in mentally. Its not a good feeling. But I would bring more attention to myself or even weird people out if I always have my head down. It sucks :/

 

[sizzlerwasbad]

I had OCD staring very badly for over 10 years. I have cured myself completely. Every individual is different of course, I hope from my heart that this can also cure you, and give you the piece of mind you finally need. This is all natural, so why not give it a try. Again; this cured me 100% of OCD staring. This is the protocol:

I wake up and mix this into water:

1000mg Myo-Inosital (B8) Purchased from a company called PowderCity
500mg Choline Bitartrate Purchased from a company called PowderCity
100mg 5-htp. This is the key ingredient I believe. Purchased from a company called PowderCity
650mg L-taurine. Purchased from a company called Hard Rhino
Tianeptine (a nootropic) Purchased from a company called New Mind. Dosage is two scoops of their blue micro-scooper, not sure what the mg is of that something like 12-15mg.

I also mix these products into the glass of water, I'm not sure if they matter but they are good for you, and I need to tell you the exact, exact thing I do, this I hope will rid you of this horrible form of OCD.

Serving size of a vitamin/mineral supplement called Essence Health Blend
1/2 tsp of Moringa from the company Organic India
Q10 powder from Powder City
4mg Piperine Powder City

To give you a back story....I had lost all hope with this OCD staring, I just coped, I functioned but it was stressful with all the social stigma and confusion from people, anyone who suffers from this knows all that comes with it...and how sad it is and frustrating. I really just stumbled upon this serendipitously, I am just a regular person, not a doctor. I live a healthy lifestyle so it was basically me just being interested in these products for health reasons/stress reasons. In the back of my mind of course I was thinking "hey maybe it will make this horrible condition go away, but I highly doubt it". So after I took this mix one day ( I think it was 3 days after doing this mix in the morning) I went to the grocery store not thinking anything about maybe being cured, after over 10 years of this I never gave much thought to it going away. But as I stood in line to pay with many people around me which would usually spark off all the symptoms, I noticed I had no OCD staring feelings. It was like something out of a movie, it was just GONE. I got goosebumps and felt really elated. I am able to have a laser beam steady eye gaze now, just like anybody else. The OCD staring vanished, and I had it bad. I take this mix every morning, in the later afternoon I will take another 1000mg of the B8 and 500mg of choline. I have cured myself from this. I hope this works for you. This information is coming from the depths of my soul, may you be healed as well.

 

[NuthinSimple]

I have the same problem. I think mine stems from the fact that I think I have to make a move every time I make eye contact with somebody. Since I don't know how to react I choose to not have to react so I avoid eye contact.