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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
It could be largely the way you are wired: your innate cognitive style. You seem to be an analyser and systemiser. This is more common in males, so people might attribute incorrect motives to you doing this. The woman's feedback reminds me of complaints made about many males.

I think that if their egos are too fragile to deal with it, that is largely their problem. However, you could ask for feedback on the way you do it; she seems vague on this point.

Yes. I enjoy it because it's the main way I can connect with and understand people. Without an analytical component to a conversation, I lose interest.

I barely speak to anyone. The only person I converse with is my friend, whom I do it to, but who is extremely easy-going about my quirks. I prefer to remain very quiet in general and not share my thoughts.
No, she wasn't really vague. It's not the analysing per se, it's the fact that the way I do it somehow comes across that I think I'm superior, which is not entirely untrue, though of course unfounded and lodged in insecurity. That is unfortunate indeed, and I'm not proud of it.

It was fair and accurate feedback.

I am a systems thinker and process-oriented. That is no excuse for coming across as arrogant. Someone else also feels that I control the group every session, and she's not the only one.

I'm really not quite sure how I achieve this but I do dominate and I'm always the first to speak, and then not just once. Others feel it doesn't give them a voice. But that is another point.

Thanks for the vote of confidence but this is fair comment and I really need to change it.

Honest feedback delivered with good intent is precious, and I intend to run with it.
 
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