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I wonder if anyone else feels this way.

In highschool, school was simple. Being at the top of my class took no effort at all, pretty much just showing up and doing half the homework was enough to get A's on all the tests. This was the same with AP classes, and the same with the SAT. Nothing took effort.

Now in college, I can no longer do that. It takes a lot of effort and work to get good grades. It probably doesn't help that I'm taking overloaded semesters, but even if I wasn't I'd be doing way more work than high school and not getting as good of grades.

It really bothers me because I get a lot of my self worth from being smarter than everybody. So it's distressing that I'm not anymore. I'm still above average, but only slightly and only with a ton of effort. So I no longer feel special. How are people who have social lives doing better than me in these classes!
 

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I think people who have a social side apart from studying often gets a lot of positive energy. They look forward going to school, talking to friends. In some cases that energy is converted to motivation to succeed, both in school and in a social environment.

My sister just aced her collage, very different from me, since I has always been a lone wolf. And even though she does her homework she has a lot of social breaks and travels and such with her friends.

You can still be smarter than everybody. If you try to be 'ahead' of people. Like preparing before a class or going through a chapter prior to doing so in class :) But you need to ask yourself if it's worth it.
 

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How are people who have social lives doing better than me in these classes!
Cause they have better genes or you are attending the wrong college. It may, also, be just your impression that they do not learn much cause they are more social. They may, actually, be spending more time than you learning. Cause, although you may not go out more than they do, you do not necessarily learn more, you may just be on your computer.

I can't say I was ever proud of getting high grades or being top of my class. That it made me feel good about myself. I was always just relieved. Getting a low grade was making me feel like ****, very stupid and disgusted with myself. There was no need for someone to keep me a speech, because of some low grade, because I was a lot harsher on myself than they could have ever been. It was obviously very unhealthy and it made my anxiety worse.
 
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