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Something I've noticed about myself is the fact that I never ask people for favours. Even small ones like asking for a lift or asking someone to fill in at work I can't seem to do. Despite this, people seem to be always asking me for favours and, being the pushover I am, I always seem to do them for people. Even when I'm asking someone if they want to hang out or something I feel uncomfortable because I feel as if they are doing me a massive favour by sacrificing their time. Do you guys experience this and is it related to SA?
 

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I get the exact same way when even thinking about asking for favours, I just assume asking them would be inconveniencing, but I have no problems bending over backwards for people if they need a hand, no matter how big. I think it's all tied back to self worth and determining personal boundaries. But yeah, this is very frustrating for me too.
 

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Yes, it's very hard to ask people to do anything for me, even when they've already offered to help. And I can't ask people to do things with me, because I can't imagine they would get anything out of hanging out with me when I'd probably just be quiet and boring (although I actually usually don't even accept invitations to do things for this reason). But I'll generally do pretty much anything people ask me to do for them even if I don't have the time or really don't want to.
 

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I feel like an intrusion or a burden on people at the best of times, so asking for favours is not something I make a regular habit of...

And I'm the same way as you... if I'M the one being asked, I'll just about always bend over backwards trying to help them... Yet I can't turn it around and be the one doing the asking...
 

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Liddle Wun
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I'm exactly the same! I avoid asking people for favours unless I absolutely need to. But then if someone asks me to do something for them I bend over backwards to help; even if it's at an inconvenience to me.
I get used all the time because I'm not strong enough to stand up for myself and say no.. Though on the rare occasion that I do ask for a favour, the person usually forgets. And I don't want to be a nag so I end up waiting ages before mustering up the courage to remind them - they say sorry; they'll do it soon - but then it never ends up being done.
And yet, that same person will keep asking me for favours and I'm too nice to turn them down or mention the fact that they never did anything for me when I needed them.
 

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I'm the same, I never ask for favours but will do anything for anyone if they ask me. I feel really awkward asking anyone for help, and will go to silly measures to avoiding asking for help. When I bought my car, a couple of years ago, I drove my old car 20 miles to pick up the new one, drove my new car home, caught a bus back to where my old car was (but unfortunately the last stop was 5 miles away from where my car was), had to walk 5 miles along a grass verge in the dark, then drive my old car home. All after a day at work. If it wasn't for my anxiety in talking to people, i'm sure I could have got a lift of a relative, or got a taxi, but I just couldn't bring myself to do either. At the time I would rather go to these extreme lengths just in order to not have to speak to anyone.
 

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and will go to silly measures to avoiding asking for help
Yep, have done similar stuff in the past, I convince myself that I do this because I want to be independent but really I just figure why would anyone want to go out of their way. Plus then I'd have to work on having conversation topics.

that same person will keep asking me for favours
I dream that one day you know that strength will come to remind them that they forgot. But then I don't want to make people unhappy either haha so theres no win there.
 

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I hate asking people for favors. It makes me feel like I'm bothering them. As a matter of fact, I needed a ride home last night, but no one working was going my way. Actually, i didn't even bother asking to find out. Instead I ended up walkin home ( maybe 3-4 miles?)in the dark and boy was I scared s***less! I forgot how dark the main street was and its next to a forest preserve. There were bugs everywhere......*groan*
 

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im the same, i just can't say no to people. I always get stuck doing things i don't want to, but i feel like i can't just say no. i remember working at a restaurant and my coworkers would always ask me to fill in for them and i would always say yes and end up working double shifts and weekends. i never ask for favors either, i just feel like im bothering people.
 
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