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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I get it almost everyday. I've suffered from SA for 8 years and I've pretty much been recluse and isolated for that entire time. I'm 24 now and I'm in the process of reducing my anxiety. I've lost all my friends, haven't had a girlfriend in that 8 year time period, having difficulty making a career choice, haven't done any travelling around the world, etc. I get really depressed thinking about all of that. I get the feeling life is passing me by. I then envision what it is like to do the things I want to do in life but for some reason I can't force myself to do it. I'm so used sitting inside.

How can I break the cycle? How can I take charge and do the things I want to do in life?

Your help is greatly appreciated? :)
 

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The Weight Of The World
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20 Posts
I completely relate to your problem,
First I came to terms that I have this problem and it will make things in life a bit more tough but it wont restrict me unless I let it (easier said than done TRUST ME I know) Then I also came to terms as things are a process, I always want quick results. I try to maybe write out a start to my goal
to get my foot in the door, of whatever it is I am trying to accomplish. Stay motivated and some discipline doesnt hurt, make it simple
start w/ one small goal, It is a process, stay with it
Good luck
Tony
 

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o_O
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6,024 Posts
I feel like that all the time. Like as years go by, I realize that I'm not really doing anything that others around me are doing and I'm just stuck, even though I want to do something and see myself being a certain way in the future, I feel like the SA will continue holding me back and I will never reach my goal.
 

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Simon Says...
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1,693 Posts
Yeah... on a related note, I've always sort of imagined things to get better and then they don't. Which really is procrastination I suppose.

What I mean is... things were crap for me in primary school... I figured... they'd get better in secondary school. Maybe I could act differently. Etc. etc... then secondary comes around and nothing changes.
Well... maybe things will be better when I'm... 15/16.
Nope.

College! College will be great. All new people. All new place. I can really make myself into a new man and make friends and I basically have a blank slate to make a new life.

Nope. :(
 

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Yeah, it's passing me by and all I can seem to do is watch =/ Some of my issues are hopeless, others I try to change.
 

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Protector of the Den
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15,048 Posts
Life is passing me by as well. I've never had a girlfriend or even been on a date. A lot of people my age already have careers and children. I'm still finishing my first two years of college. I put off going to college for a couple of years. When I finally started college, I kept changing my major. Now, I'm trying desperately to catch up. 15 year olds have more of a social life than me :( I feel like I have so much lost time to make up for. There are so many things that I could have been doing over the years.
 

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UnDeRrAtED
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I feel so behind in my development it discourages me but I keep on struggling which is a good thing.
 

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Worst poster, hands down
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Life is passing me by as well. I've never had a girlfriend or even been on a date. A lot of people my age already have careers and children. I'm still finishing my first two years of college. I put off going to college for a couple of years. When I finally started college, I kept changing my major. Now, I'm trying desperately to catch up. 15 year olds have more of a social life than me :( I feel like I have so much lost time to make up for. There are so many things that I could have been doing over the years.
I'm pretty much the same. I've been in the uni three years now and I can't put up with this bulls*it. I need to change my major or gtfo, be a plumber or something.
 

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Done with SA
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1,818 Posts
I always feel life is passing me by. It's something I don't think you can help feeling when it's true. Most of your friends are working, moving away, going to school, in relationships, getting married, having children and you're still stuck in one place, not making any huge moves forward in your life.

I saw an old friend in the store today. Thankfully, she didn't notice me because I sort of avoided her. I knew she'd say something because we've met a few times before and she always says something. Last time I saw her, she had just gotten into a relationship. This was a little over a year ago. This time, I noticed she has an engagement ring on her finger and looks like she's carrying a bun in the oven. We're the same age, went to school together, and I feel like she's more of a grown up than I am because she's doing more grown up things. It annoys and depresses me. I am happy for her(from a far, of course), but it also makes me feel angry at myself because I could be doing the same things and living life if not for this SA.
 

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blessed with lucky sevens
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840 Posts
I'm 21 and I see all my old friends from school finishing their university degrees and getting real jobs and all that now and I'm still in the same situation as when I was 19.

It's depressing.
 

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calm
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264 Posts
no I dont ever get this feeling but i understand where you come from though.

break the cycle by doing something extraordinary, like a long trip to europe or south east asia, whatever you like.
go out, try new medication. call old forgotten friends, you will be surprised how nice they react hearing from you.
oh poor you, if you only were a girl i could definitely help you in a way ;)
 

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Done with SA
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1,818 Posts
no I dont ever get this feeling but i understand where you come from though.

break the cycle by doing something extraordinary, like a long trip to europe or south east asia, whatever you like.
go out, try new medication. call old forgotten friends, you will be surprised how nice they react hearing from you.
oh poor you, if you only were a girl i could definitely help you in a way ;)
That would be great if I had the money and wasn't afraid of going out of the country by myself.
 

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calm
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That would be great if I had the money and wasn't afraid of going out of the country by myself.
i wrote it somewhere else, there was acutally a thread about traveling alone, however I would strongly advise not to travel alone. i consider my self outgoing, and i was a week there alone beside talking shallow to some people i felt really so lonely the first time in my life. then i got to known a woman of this country, it got wonderful but it was really by chance.
 
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