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Starlight and moonbeams
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Just curious. The reaction to my most recent thread has made me think about this.

Even if you realize it's not realistic, do you fantasize about members of the opposite sex (or same sex, if you are gay or lesbian) who are much more attractive than you are, or than you perceive yourself?

I'm not talking about dating and/or relationships. In those cases, you have to be realistic. But I'm talking about in the sense of the porn fantasy (or sex books, like 50 Shades of Grey.) People seem to flock to the same kind of person, over and over again, even if they don't date that type of person, being realistic.

And let me ask you guys a second question. If you realistically had the chance to sleep with the person of your dreams, in looks, would you do it?
 

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Just curious. The reaction to my most recent thread has made me think about this.

Even if you realize it's not realistic, do you fantasize about members of the opposite sex (or same sex, if you are gay or lesbian) who are much more attractive than you are, or than you perceive yourself?

I'm not talking about dating and/or relationships. In those cases, you have to be realistic. But I'm talking about in the sense of the porn fantasy (or sex books, like 50 Shades of Grey.) People seem to flock to the same kind of person, over and over again, even if they don't date that type of person, being realistic.

And let me ask you guys a second question. If you realistically had the chance to sleep with the person of your dreams, in looks, would you do it?
LOL, your paragraph about dating/relationships amused me. I do this then too. I'll want to get to know/date someone who I perceive to be much better looking than I am looks-wise and body wise. I tell myself they're out of my league, but that doesn't stop me from fantasizing or maybe even asking them out. I'm such a glutton for punishment sometimes.
 

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ugly ****
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Yes, I think it's human instinct to wanting things they can't get

And for the second question it's definitely a yes, that's actually my motivation to work on myself so hard.
 

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How am i even supposed to know whether a member of the opposite sex would be considered better looking than me anyways? Make up a poll, and only bi-sexual people can answer? Since i like women, how am i supposed to compare them to my hairy manliness in order to answer these questions?
 

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Sorry I think its kinda sad to base everything SOLEY on looks. Some of the best looking guys I have known have been the biggest douchebags on the planet once they open their mouths. It depends on how you define hot. For me there is more than one dimension to that....beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. But, WT, if you are waiting for Kaley Cuoco or whoever to come along and offer herself to you, I think you are in for a long wait. You might have better luck with women if you stop comparing them to photoshopped models.
 

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Starlight and moonbeams
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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
How am i even supposed to know whether a member of the opposite sex would be considered better looking than me anyways? Make up a poll, and only bi-sexual people can answer? Since i like women, how am i supposed to compare them to my hairy manliness in order to answer these questions?
That's a very good question.

I can't answer how good looking I am, either. Many people say I'm ugly, or average looking, on here, but I've had some very pretty girls make moves on me...so I know I can't be atrocious.

I guess what's funny is that the same thing that keeps me a virgin, my Body Dismorphic Disorder, is tied into the fact that I feel that I'm inferior...and every single time I get rejected, that is just held up to a standard.

Meh, it would be easier if I could separate dating from looks. But I have a similar outlook to the female poster Barette on here, and if I could get plastic surgery (afford it), I would get it, so I didn't feel so plain anymore.

And I didn't feel plain until I was bullied over my appearance in my teens. That's another thing I just can't get over.
 

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Sometimes when I'm around a girl I like, I fantasize about sex with her. I'm not sure if it's normal or not, but it happens a lot and then I do weird stuff like sitting really close to her to the point that I'm touching her and I always find an excuse to put my hands on her. Maybe it's not all that weird and it's just flirting, idk.
 

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Starlight and moonbeams
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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Sorry I think its kinda sad to base everything SOLEY on looks. Some of the best looking guys I have known have been the biggest douchebags on the planet once they open their mouths. It depends on how you define hot. For me there is more than one dimension to that....beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. But, WT, if you are waiting for Kaley Cuoco or whoever to come along and offer herself to you, I think you are in for a long wait. You might have better luck with women if you stop comparing them to photoshopped models.
Wine, with all respect, you misread my question.

I said fantasize, not date. I know that a Kaley Cuoco would not be attracted to me. I'm not that kind of girl's type.

That being said, I'm talking about fantasizing about people who are much more attractive than you. You may never be able to date Brad Pitt or Johnny Depp, but would you fantasize about them?

And of course this is a question based on looks. I stated that in the OP. It wasn't about dating or relationships, but a general question.
 

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I generally don't fantasize about guys unless I talked to them a few times and they are exactly my type. So that doesn't really happen now much at all since I don't talk to very many people and if I do they are usually not that good looking. I don't watch TV so I don't really think about celebrities. In the past few years the only time it happened was in a couple science courses I took that had labs and put us into groups. There was 1 guy in each group (1 hispanic guy and 1 middle-eastern guy) that was kind of hot. Both way too young for me (early 20s) but anyways....

Oh yeah, and one half-filipino/half-white guy (shy, quiet type and a bit tall with a nice build) in one Japanese course I took. I talked to him a bit at one little Japanese event we went to. I thought about how it might be nice to bang him in the bathroom at school.
 

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To answer that...

I am in a transitional period, and once again my life sucks, at least temporarily. So instead of venting about my life, I'm coming on here and trying to debate things.

I'm sorry if I'm coming off as rude lately. It seems like my life spiraled down the drain in Winter 2011, and I'm still trying to pick my spirits up.
oh i didnt mean it as an insult or anything i really just thought that the threads u created were interesting... and yea i understand i just got out of one of those transitional periods you were talking about so i may not know exactly what your going through, but i can relate all the same
 

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Starlight and moonbeams
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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
oh i didnt mean it as an insult or anything i really just thought that the threads u created were interesting... and yea i understand i just got out of one of those transitional periods you were talking about so i may not know exactly what your going through, but i can relate all the same
Thanks man. I appreciate it.

I just feel really lonely right now, and kind of feel trapped with no friends around. And it's impossible making friends at college. I don't know how anybody does it. People there think I'm weird.

Sorry for going off topic.
 

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I only fantasize about someone if I have a crush on them. There is no person of my dreams in looks.
this is probably widely true. and incidentally the crushes tend to be on more attractive people than less attractive ones.
 

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Thanks man. I appreciate it.

I just feel really lonely right now, and kind of feel trapped with no friends around. And it's impossible making friends at college. I don't know how anybody does it. People there think I'm weird.

Sorry for going off topic.
i feel u on that one cause i tried making friends at college aswell and it didnt go like i would have hoped... i guess its just hard join into an already formed clique... well i have to go to bed cause its hella late but if u ever need anyone to talk to im here for u bro
 

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this is probably widely true. and incidentally the crushes tend to be on more attractive people than less attractive ones.
I don't think any of the people I have had crushes on would be widely considered to be more attractive than me, if that better answers the question. Maybe the high school one at the time. Pretty sure none of the others would be. Or to possibly better explain what I meant, I fantasize about people because I like them and how they interact with me. If their appearance is involved, it isn't primary.
 
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