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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Anyone deal with any forms of dissociation, perhaps due to anxiety or even of itself another disorder? I have depersonalization disorder and other similar dissociative feelings that don't quite fit into any particular category that I know of. Feeling like the world is a dream (I know it's real), like I have some kind of odd sinus infection that never goes away, things around me feeling unreal, feeling like I'm underwater or something similar. Feelings of my hands not being attached to my body when I'm typing, for another instance. Like they're on automatic pilot. Or like I'm not even myself and am seeing through the eyes of others or someone else is in control of me.
 

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Losing Ground
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You might be suffering from derealization more so than depersonalization. I used to suffer very badly from derealization. I used to post at this community (mostly lurked) maybe it would help you to check it out. http://www.dpselfhelp.com/
 

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I had a number of episodes where I dealt with pretty severe depersonalization and derealization. I tend to be a daydreamer and more involved in my mind than in reality. Dissociation has become a part of my daily life. When I'm going through a bad period in my life it becomes very severe and makes me feel like I'm going insane. When things are relatively ok, then its more of a constant but mild background feeling. Its difficult to describe because dissociation exists on a continuum for me, anywhere from a feeling of very slight dreaminess or confusion about my identity, to an almost complete inability to function and feeling of total disconnection. Dissociation is just another aspect of my daily existence that I've learned to accept. I certainly feel for you though because it can be an absolutely terrifying feeling that robs you of any sense of control.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I had a number of episodes where I dealt with pretty severe depersonalization and derealization. I tend to be a daydreamer and more involved in my mind than in reality. Dissociation has become a part of my daily life. When I'm going through a bad period in my life it becomes very severe and makes me feel like I'm going insane. When things are relatively ok, then its more of a constant but mild background feeling. Its difficult to describe because dissociation exists on a continuum for me, anywhere from a feeling of very slight dreaminess or confusion about my identity, to an almost complete inability to function and feeling of total disconnection. Dissociation is just another aspect of my daily existence that I've learned to accept. I certainly feel for you though because it can be an absolutely terrifying feeling that robs you of any sense of control.
I know exactly what you're talking about as I tend to be the same way. I live more in my head, and its not even a conscious effort on my part. It just happens and dissociation can be mild to severe.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
I can relate, definitely - it was worst for me when my anxiety was very, very bad. It was probably a coping mechanism really, just detaching from the world because it was too much to process. It's tapered off a bit (without the use of meds), but I suspect yours will only get better if your anxiety diminishes a little. What's helped me considerably may well have been learning to drive, though I know this is a very, very poor option for some. At first I was petrified of getting behind the wheel because I feel derealized constantly - as if things aren't completely real - and was terrified I'd be so inobservant I'd get people killed. With a few months of practice though, things have improved and generally it's not quite so bad. I'm not sure if I recommend anxiolytics for this, because they can just make you feel more muddled.

I'm fairly sure it's a symptom of anxiety, unless you have other disorders.
Wow. You sound like you were how I am now. I get terrified that going out there, trying to drive, etc, the dissociative feelings will make it hard for me not to mess up and hurt someone or myself on accident. Thanks for throwing a bit of hope my way about this though!
 

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I've been suffering from similar feelings for a few years now, with them getting progressively worse as time goes on. It's horrible to live with and when I go through a particularly bad episode I feel as though I'm losing my mind.

Yesterday I was sitting outdoors with someone and I could feel it coming on quite badly, I had to really struggle to try to connect back to a sense of concrete reality. It really wasn't nice at all.
 

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Beautiful Mess
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I have borderline personality disorder and I dissociate.
 

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i find this happens to me in social situations if i'm feeling anxious and generally threatened. it's like I no longer can understand what anybody is saying. everyone is laughing and having fun and i'm sitting there like a complete retard not knowing what's going on around me. I think this is what provoked so much teasing when I was in highschool.
 

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I also suffer from depersonalization. If you don't know what it is, I just posted a rather lengthy description of my experience earlier today over at http://www.dpselfhelp.com Allow me to quote myself:

[quote="Crimson]When my DP ensues a normally dormant part of my consciousness is activated, that functions seperate from the active part. The "active" part of my mind is fully aware of what I'm doing (acting, speaking, writing, walking), but another seperate part of my mind is in the background observing and scrutinizing what the active part is doing. I've heard people say they feel as if they lose control of their actions, but that's not really the case. A part of me is in full control, but it it somehow seems faint and distant. The second consciousness that is activated during DP feels like the "real self", as if the automatic part that controls my actions is somehow not the real me, although it is. It's impossible to imagine what it feels like to someone who hasn't experienced it, but I am sure you guys know what I'm getting at.

.................

For me depersonalization and anxiety always go together in a chicken/egg relationship. I can find myself in a safe (non-anxiety provoking) situation at home and suddenly get a creeping feeling of DP; which leads to anxiety, the symptoms of which increase my self aweareness, which increases the DP, which builds more anxiety and then sends me into a panic attack. I'd call that "freaking myself out for no particular reason".

The other way around, I can be in a pubic situation (work/school/party) caught up in what I'm doing and feel almost no DP at all. Then when someone puts me on the spot, like a stranger comes up to me or the boss asks a question, my social anxiety kicks into high gear and breaks into physical symptoms (sweating/agitation/nausea), then the DP comes along as well and I "zone out" - like I described above; the consciousness splits into two, one part observing the other one that's doing the talking.[/quote]

It's definitely a form of dissociation and it's not very pleasant I can assure you. :|
 

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I dunno, but last night I had such vivid dreams and this one part there was a cat walking around my face and I thought it was real... Even 12hrs later during the day after the dream I was wondering, 'was there really a cat in my room', because my window is open without a fly screen.
 

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I often feel that I am the only person awake in the entire world. Then my thoughts shift into a place that questions whether there is a world or not. I think of the possibility that I am dreaming myself as actually being awake, or that the world that I see and feel isn't actually there at all; it is a copy of a world, as I feel displaced among it and everything in it. I have a paranoia that everyone is acting in place, playing a role where I am the lead character, watching my movements and reading my thoughts. At other times there is no audience and no one watching, and I am alone.

When I was a little boy I would have a recurring thought that I was a part of something much bigger than myself, and it was put in place for me, perhaps even by me. At a young age I was questioning the possibility of everything being in my head; that I was connected to this reality by means that I cannot see or comprehend. I currently have moments where I expect the world to tear away and reveal some true, hidden meaning that is completely different from what I am used to experiencing. I sometimes get the feeling that it is all a test, that I am being evaluated by something I can't currently understand. And perhaps when I stop existing, the world does as well. There are moments that, when people leave my sight, I question them existing at all. I am afraid that one day I will turn around and nothing will be there. And that feels very real to me, like any moment the face of the world I know will change and present me with a place so unknown and alien to me that I lose my mind, if I haven't done so already.
 

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Mmmmhmmm. This happens to me all the time. I often feel like I'm not in my body, and sometimes that someone else is seeing through my eyes. I also feel like I'm in a dream a lot, like things aren't real...It's one of the things that leads me to cutting, I really think I need to talk to a doctor more extensively about it.
 

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I think I have this very severely. I don't feel connected to myself or reality at all most of the time. I'm not functional. It's like I've gone completely up into some other world. It is frightening.
 

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Yup — ever since my social-anxiety got worse, so did my depersonalization. There's a poll on dpselfhelp.com in which members were asked if they suffered from social-anxiety. There were 18 votes for 'yes' and 1 for 'no'. At least in my life, I know my Depersonalization is closely tied with my social-anxiety.
 

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I used to feel brief periods of depersonalization and derealization in the hallway at school a lot where there were crowds of people.
 
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