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damn i wish my mom really just helped me, i mean i dont blame her but she should have fixed me when i was young, she tried once by making the doctor talk to me when i was like 11 but i just answered all his questions and faked myself of being normal, i just wanted out
 

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wooden hippie nice
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No. My mum knew something was wrong, but she has a stupifying capacity for ignorance and complacency until it's too late.
Same. My mum would rather just ignore the fact that I've always had an incredible amount of problems and shun any attempt on my part to talk to her about things. Although I know that deep down she probably does care about me, it's hurtful to basically be told to 'go away' when you're clearly in a state of absolute depression. I know I should have made more of an attempt to get help myself from a professional, but it's extremely upsetting to have a family member show no sign of caring about you or your situation.
 

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I think people always wanted to help me, but didn't know how, and I evaded their attempts in fear. My parents were always making me go do social stuff for exposure, but it was just torture for me and I never got comfortable.

she tried once by making the doctor talk to me when i was like 11 but i just answered all his questions and faked myself of being normal, i just wanted out
Same, I was evaluated as "will grow out of being shy."

I don't blame anyone for failing to help me, because I don't know how to help me either.
 

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Your Assumptions
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Mine is in denial and maintains there's nothing really wrong with me. Unrelated to SA: she once accompanied me when I had an MRI that revealed a small benign brain lesion. I still take medication for it, yet when I mentioned it again one day, she denied I had it.

My father's take when I mentioned SA and seeking help: "What do you want to learn to speak to people for?"

People wonder why I cannot inform my parents of my other diagnosis, and I struggle to answer. The above makes it somewhat clearer.
 

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Nope. I mean, people knew I was 'shy', but everyone figured I'd grow out of it. I figured something was wrong as I neared the age of 16 and told my mom and kept telling her until she got me an appointment with a therapist and we went from there.
That therapist pretty much said it was too late for me to develop socially, so he didn't last too long, as I didn't agree, but then I think maybe he was right...
 

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I was put into a drama class for a year and rugby for 2 years to help me "come out of my shell". Didn't help my SA whatsoever.
 

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fellow human
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Well... I don't know if they helped me, but they certainly didn't hold back in pointing out my shyness all the time. So... I guess a lot of pointing, and labeling.
 

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Yes. It was the "you will go to this social gathering whether you like it or not" kind of help. I don't blame them, though. I think it's rare to find parents who understand SA and know the right way to go about helping their child.
 

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When I was in middle school one of my teachers told the school psychologist to call me in, I guess they were concerned about me. But for some reason I just denied there was anything wrong with me, I guess I felt wierd and angry about talking to a psychologist at that age. Plus I had no idea what I had. Looking back, I wish I had let them help me. (Even though I'm sure they didn't have a clue what SA even was).
 

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I think only a couple of my teachers noticed but they always thought getting me to talk more would help and instead in made it worse.
 

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My parents noticed as did my teachers since I was pretty much a mute out in public, but no one seemed to have a name for it when I was a kid other than "painfully shy," and I don't think they knew the extent of it or what to do about it. I don't really believe there was anything anyone could have done that wouldn't have traumatized me even more.
 

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My parents noticed that I was very shy and tried to socialize me by forcing me into sports and clubs that were just torture for me I honestly think it made my SA worse. But I can't blame them because they were just trying to help me the best way they knew how.
They also took me to different psychologists who all just assumed I was depressed and dismissed my anxiety as something I could overcome by forcing myself in social situations. Yeah that worked well. :roll
 

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Little Winged One
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My parents were aware something was wrong-but their way of dealing with it was to ignore it or try to make fun of me to "toughen me up".
 

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She-Wolf
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no. they certainly knew how painfully shy i was. it was enabled/reinforced in a way, but i'm sure they didn't realize what effects it would have in the long run.
 

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I didn't end up with SA until I was in my early 30's. I got help as soon as I felt I couldn't deal with the problems I was going through at the time.
 

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no. they certainly knew how painfully shy i was. it was enabled/reinforced in a way, but i'm sure they didn't realize what effects it would have in the long run.
Yeah, this is kind of what went on with me.
Seeing as I didn't go out and I stayed in unlike most teens where I lived, well, my parents praised this and would always tell me things like, 'well, at least you're a good child, you don't get into trouble' or 'you don't need friends anyway, they can be bad for you' or 'you don't need to worry about boyfriends anyway, they just get you in trouble'.

Didn't really help much. I probably should have been encouraged to get out, make friends more, and have relationships, but I wasn't.
Now, they try to get me to do it and, well, now I don't know how, so I stay away from doing it. Mainly, because I'm embarrassed by lack of knowledge of it all.
 

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I was painfully shy as a child, even around family. My mom tried to get me to be less shy. She would make me visit with family or If I had a doctors appointment she would make me tell the doctor what was wrong, instead of letting me just sit there without saying a thing. But she didn't really understand what I was feeling. As I got older she would try to force me to do things with other kids from my school when I didn't want to.
In my teen years she took me to a counselor who diagnosed me with SA, also to a doctor where I was put on meds. It helped but I don't think my mom or anyone else can really understand what it feels like to have SA unless you experience it.
I haven't been on meds or seen a counselor for years now, and things with my SA have been worse lately. It's hard when the people you love just don't understand how you feel. They end up saying or doing things that are more hurtful than helpful.
 
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