I started working at a coffee house about a month ago.
This was a big step for me, because in the past, I have taken physically exhausting, back breaking labor over the emotional drain that dealing with the public would cause.
With medication however, I can be a very good conversationalist, and am somewhat likeable. Just looking inward, I feel very proud of the fact that I have taken this step, since most jobs require dealing with people in some shape or form, so I felt this is a fear that I must overcome. I feel I have done very well for my first few weeks. I smile (sometimes forced, but at least I do it), I make fluid small talk with customers, and have many laughing at my corny jokes or anecdotes, a lot are as nice as can be, and I seem to get more positive feedback than negative. Some customers are rude and some have gotten very upset with me for messing up a drink, but I ussually shrug it off, and try focusing on the the positive experiences.
The problem is, my manager doesn't look at me as someone with social anxiety tackling a difficult situation and doing well under the circumstances. He looks at me as a new worker that needs to fall in line and be more bubbly. I would never tell a place I work at that I have social anxiety or that I was so agoraphobic 2 years ago, that I couldn't even leave my house. Me having the courage to take on a job like this is an accomplishment to me. I don't expect them to understand or care about this, as this is not their problem, but mine.
I thought I was doing well, but the manager called me into his office on Friday, and told me that I'm not doing well, and that other coworkers have been complaining about the fact that I'm a difficult person to read. They say I'm unapproachable and he doesn't think I'm at the level of service they want at this store. Some of these people I haven't even worked the same shifts with, so I don't understand the complaints. The people who I work with, I always introduce myself, tell them my name, and tell them that I'm kind of new to the job. From there various small talk ussually happens. I don't really have a problem talking with people one on one, and am not intimidated by anyone.
My manger, however is constantly correcting me and judging me when I'm making a drink. There always seems to be something wrong.
I don't really have a problem with this in general, but it really begins to take a toll on me after a while, and I feel myself breaking down a bit. I try not to take it personally, but I don't see him being as critical towards some of the people working there. Personally, I think anyone who is female and attractive there gets a pass, because he seems like somewhat of a horndog.
I'm more worried about losing this job than anything else. I've put a lot into this, and while I make minimum wage, I actually like the job, spend a lot of time outside of work trying to memorize how to make the drinks and do it quicker, look forward to coming into work, and try and have fun with it.
I find it disheartening that I'm still being judged as being incapable of doing this job when I really feel I have done well and I feel like I've tried to learn from the criticism, rather than let it get to me and hurt me emotionally.
I don't know what to do to change though. I feel like I'm doing the best I can. I don't complain, I never call in sick, I do the job, I smile and am polite to the customers, I make small talk better than most of the others, but because a few coworkers don't like my personality, I was taken to the manager's office and told that I need to correct my behavior.
Has anyone had similar problems at a job, and found ways to rectify it?
Also, how do you deal with criticism in a positive way? I don't have a problem with justifiable criticism. For instance, if I were to show up late, and got yelled at for that, I would see no problem with that, as there's real no good excuse for that. But sometimes I feel like my manager is looking for things to criticize at times, which can make me nervous, and cause me to screw up more. I ussually just nod my head, and say sorry, meekly, but I don't know if it really helps me become better at my job.
This was a big step for me, because in the past, I have taken physically exhausting, back breaking labor over the emotional drain that dealing with the public would cause.
With medication however, I can be a very good conversationalist, and am somewhat likeable. Just looking inward, I feel very proud of the fact that I have taken this step, since most jobs require dealing with people in some shape or form, so I felt this is a fear that I must overcome. I feel I have done very well for my first few weeks. I smile (sometimes forced, but at least I do it), I make fluid small talk with customers, and have many laughing at my corny jokes or anecdotes, a lot are as nice as can be, and I seem to get more positive feedback than negative. Some customers are rude and some have gotten very upset with me for messing up a drink, but I ussually shrug it off, and try focusing on the the positive experiences.
The problem is, my manager doesn't look at me as someone with social anxiety tackling a difficult situation and doing well under the circumstances. He looks at me as a new worker that needs to fall in line and be more bubbly. I would never tell a place I work at that I have social anxiety or that I was so agoraphobic 2 years ago, that I couldn't even leave my house. Me having the courage to take on a job like this is an accomplishment to me. I don't expect them to understand or care about this, as this is not their problem, but mine.
I thought I was doing well, but the manager called me into his office on Friday, and told me that I'm not doing well, and that other coworkers have been complaining about the fact that I'm a difficult person to read. They say I'm unapproachable and he doesn't think I'm at the level of service they want at this store. Some of these people I haven't even worked the same shifts with, so I don't understand the complaints. The people who I work with, I always introduce myself, tell them my name, and tell them that I'm kind of new to the job. From there various small talk ussually happens. I don't really have a problem talking with people one on one, and am not intimidated by anyone.
My manger, however is constantly correcting me and judging me when I'm making a drink. There always seems to be something wrong.
I don't really have a problem with this in general, but it really begins to take a toll on me after a while, and I feel myself breaking down a bit. I try not to take it personally, but I don't see him being as critical towards some of the people working there. Personally, I think anyone who is female and attractive there gets a pass, because he seems like somewhat of a horndog.
I'm more worried about losing this job than anything else. I've put a lot into this, and while I make minimum wage, I actually like the job, spend a lot of time outside of work trying to memorize how to make the drinks and do it quicker, look forward to coming into work, and try and have fun with it.
I find it disheartening that I'm still being judged as being incapable of doing this job when I really feel I have done well and I feel like I've tried to learn from the criticism, rather than let it get to me and hurt me emotionally.
I don't know what to do to change though. I feel like I'm doing the best I can. I don't complain, I never call in sick, I do the job, I smile and am polite to the customers, I make small talk better than most of the others, but because a few coworkers don't like my personality, I was taken to the manager's office and told that I need to correct my behavior.
Has anyone had similar problems at a job, and found ways to rectify it?
Also, how do you deal with criticism in a positive way? I don't have a problem with justifiable criticism. For instance, if I were to show up late, and got yelled at for that, I would see no problem with that, as there's real no good excuse for that. But sometimes I feel like my manager is looking for things to criticize at times, which can make me nervous, and cause me to screw up more. I ussually just nod my head, and say sorry, meekly, but I don't know if it really helps me become better at my job.