[m10]

Deleted

 

[TragicallyUnfashionable]

I hope someone who has actually experienced this answers you. I've avoided intimate relationships for so long I don't have a clue how I would approach this. I'd like to think that I'd be open from the start - before any deep feelings start to form. I imagine I would be very hurt if they didn't respond kindly but I don't know exactly what I'd do about it. Hang in there.

 

[Fairyxo]

I'll be honest, when me and my fiance started going out, I didn't have SA. It was a good two years into our relationship that I developed it.

Though I would tell them after we'd being going out for a few weeks.

 

[mjatte]

well, if its the case that you have SA serious enough that you need to have this conversation, chances are your sa is very obvious anyways, and you will have to explain your actions and shy behavior almost immediately. We had already broken up, when I started to say more about how I didn't know how to talk very well, and was really shy..she just said "maybe your autistic," "I can never talk to you, you don't know how to have a conversation!" are the things she said to me..I told her it really hurt me when someone tells me that I can't talk well, because I like to believe I've made a lot of progress with SA, and when someone close to me tells me that I haven't, that really hurts, and brings me down. and as far as the relationships, in most cases It is what it is; whatever sa makes you do, its who you are, there is no excusing it just because your working on making it better..if it makes you less interesting, less conversational, then you are these things, and confessing your sa is fine, but it doesn't really change anything....just my experience..

 

[tigerlilly]

I'll be honest, when me and my fiance started going out, I didn't have SA. It was a good two years into our relationship that I developed it.

Though I would tell them after we'd being going out for a few weeks.

i don't think you can really set a time frame for when to tell your partner, but i don't know too much about this... i've avoided relationships my whole life. i would say you should either get to know them and let them know you have SA before you start dating, or wait until you feel safe enough. try to ease them into it, don't just be like "hey, guess what? i have severe social anxiety, and i'm in therapy and taking medication for it."