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I don't really want to be noticed. I go to the gym but am afraid of getting strong. (Not really a problem as I am the opposite of that.) As far as my appearance, I would rather get fat I think. There are other things too, like not doing as well as I could as far as my education, not having a good job yet, and not having a decent social life.
 

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Maybe you have something repressed, and it wants to stay repressed so it urges you to find other issues that may hold you down?

Sometimes the mind works that way.
 

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Is it fear of greater responsibility/pressure because you will then be in the "spotlight" and will have to perform without being able to "hide"? In many ways, I'm like this. On the one hand, I don't want people to treat me like crap (as before when I was a labourer/cleaner) but I don't want too much attention because I don't want responsibility.
 
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