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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
post anything that you think makes a conversation easier/more pleasant/nice!!
i'll start:
complimenting someone always goes the right way and are great ways to start a conversation!
 

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Putting the SAS in sass
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Asking questions/showing a general interest in what the other person is saying is a good way to avoid awkward silences. Lots of the time people will talk on and on about themselves (not necessarily in a narcissistic way) if you give them the chance.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Asking questions/showing a general interest in what the other person is saying is a good way to avoid awkward silences. Lots of the time people will talk on and on about themselves (not necessarily in a narcissistic way) if you give them the chance.
thanks!! will deffo work on this it really keeps the anxious thoughts away when in conversation!!
 

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complimenting someone always goes the right way and are great ways to start a conversation!
If only it were so. We have to worry that compliments will be taken the wrong way. Unfortunately some people are suspicious that your compliments have ulterior motives, that you are trying to get something from them. Especially if a guy compliments a girl on her clothes / hairstyle / appearance etc. lol
 

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I find that complimenting someone can backfire, if they really don't want to talk they can almost be rude and hurtful... They give you "that look". Or maybe it's in my head. :?
 

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Hmm I think compliments go well but just not as conversion starters. Just say something about the place your at like the weather or something and once you got a start you can compliment.
 

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-Listening to more intensely, give them more space to speak and say things. Sometimes during the conversation it's a lot better to be quiet than to give a forced answer.

-Often being quiet can create a vacuum in the interaction, making the other person feel more inclined to talk more.

-Not trying to think things beforehand, but let things come spontaneously and most of all, relevant to the flow of the conversation

-Make a remark of something situational, funny is preferred

-Become a bit more vulnerable. This doesn't mean that you start to weep your sorrows to the other person, but be more open about yourself. Watch this amazing TED talk by Brené Brown

-People love stories. Even an ordinary thing can be made interesting through great storytelling (and most often is)

-Ask open ended questions, usually starting with 'why' 'what' etc. People will become more open and they are forced to say anything else than "yes" or "no".

-You want to avoid an interview, though

-Also try to ask too generic questions, try to be more creative and unique.
Here are some conversation ideas that I found from google. (Here's more ideas for creative questions)

-Avoid one-word responses, like 'yes' / 'no', no need to babble, but try to bring something more to the conversation.

-You only get one chance to notice new haircut (sometimes new clothes)

-Avoid R.A.P.E, Religion, Abortion, Politics and Economics.

-Remember F.O.R.D, Family, Occupation, Recreation and Dreams
 

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Happy little duck
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-Listening to more intensely, give them more space to speak and say things. Sometimes during the conversation it's a lot better to be quiet than to give a forced answer.

-Often being quiet can create a vacuum in the interaction, making the other person feel more inclined to talk more.

-Not trying to think things beforehand, but let things come spontaneously and most of all, relevant to the flow of the conversation

-Make a remark of something situational, funny is preferred

-Become a bit more vulnerable. This doesn't mean that you start to weep your sorrows to the other person, but be more open about yourself. Watch this amazing TED talk by Brené Brown

-People love stories. Even an ordinary thing can be made interesting through great storytelling (and most often is)

-Ask open ended questions, usually starting with 'why' 'what' etc. People will become more open and they are forced to say anything else than "yes" or "no".

-You want to avoid an interview, though

-Also try to ask too generic questions, try to be more creative and unique.
Here are some conversation ideas that I found from google. (Here's more ideas for creative questions)

-Avoid one-word responses, like 'yes' / 'no', no need to babble, but try to bring something more to the conversation.

-You only get one chance to notice new haircut (sometimes new clothes)

-Avoid R.A.P.E, Religion, Abortion, Politics and Economics.

-Remember F.O.R.D, Family, Occupation, Recreation and Dreams
These actually sound really useful : D
 

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conversatiob tips

Have a few comments ready to say, relevant to the situation you're both in . Start with one of them and continue the conversation. Empathy, enthusiasm and humour in the topic usually helps to relax, and helps the thoughts flow more freely, meaning you'll contribute more readily.

But if the person is only giving one word answers in return, don't force a conversation!

And did I forget to mention you need confidence and a lack/absence of anxiety to actually start.... The irony :um
 

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- holding eye contact. It shows confidence and the person you are looking at feels you are present in the moment and thereby can build a more interesting conversation.

- smiling. Smiling shows you are happy, friendly, having a good time and that you accept the other person.

- having an 'open body language', which Means your front is facing the person you are talking with, that you are relaxed in shoulder/neck areas, not picking yourself in the hair/face, not holding arms crossed or infront of your torso, just let the arms hang Loose from your body.

- if you find it to 'much' standing with full front to another person, try get to the side of him/her, thereby you Guys are not looking directly into eachother all the time.

- some light touching shows comfort with another person. It can be friendly such as a handshake, a tap on the shoulders, or more sexual if its a date such as a hug or the hand on lower back.

- in general, try to keep a relax, positive and funny attitude to the World. The more you relax, the better your conversations will be. Dont take yourself so serious, just try Things out and if you fail/say something you dont like, dont be so hard on yourself. Just joke around and have fun. Meditation, enough sleep, healthy foods and cardio training is great stuff to be allaround more relaxed.

- people are in generel very selfcentered and are just waiting to get their chance to speak Again. People are more interested in hearing themselves than others, so dont be like that. Actual listen to what the other person is saying and relate or ask in, instead of just skipping it so you got your chance to say something. Again, meditation is great for you to zooming in on this.

- dont get trapped in a 'interview mode' in the conversation, meaning dont just ask question after question. It gets really boring fast for the other person. A good thing to keep a conversation natural is to ask for something and then relate by finding the keywords. Ex: If a person says: "I was out with a friend on the Beach to get some ice cream". the keywords here are: friend, Beach and ice cream. And then you can relate to them as you want to.
*Try this Little exercise for 10-15 min. every day, get a dictionary and randomly open it and point on a random Word and then you have to speak 2 min. nonstop about this Word and see how much you can relate/link to this. We speak through how we relate to Things so this is a great exercise. Look for more on this in the book "Impro" by Keith Johnstone.

- a passive person is a boring person, try to not being too nice just to be nice, but be more direct, aggresive, leading and such. Much more interesting.
 
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