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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I really want to email some of the people that hurt me in the past. I want to tell them that it's not true and ask them why. I need some relief. Have you ever done this and did it work out well?
 

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They forgot about it already, yet you still hold on to that hurt. Why? Why give them fuel to hurt you again and again. Unless you're a masochist for emotional abuse, then go ahead and message them. Either way, they won't give a damn about you.
 

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I really want to email some of the people that hurt me in the past. I want to tell them that it's not true and ask them why. I need some relief. Have you ever done this and did it work out well?
it wont work, email is so passe

get their phone number, ask them for coffee then tell them off in a filled coffee shop

that will change you for the better
 

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Its dawn here
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yep i feel like this for a boy i had crush on ..at schooling..he used to speak rude behind my back..i didnt do anything coz i was shy that time...but now m not i want him to meet me n i will bash him off seriously...
 

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Meek
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Feek the Fear and do it Anyway (old school self help book) actually advocates doing this...writing/emailing people from your past and saying, 'thanks for doing xyz to me. T made me learn xyz'...obviously the author is big on getting closure. Realistically though, the other person will likely be at best amused...and worst outright mocking/weirded out; depending on whether they're someone who treated you poorly or well.

I sometimes consider doing this (to those who were kind, not mean) but I'd feel silly and think of a way to phrase things where it wouldn't come off sounding way over the top.
 

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Dont do it, they're a-holes. they're not going to feel any guilt i hate to say it but its true.. It gives them emotional comfort and reinforces their ego when they were putting you down. It's there way of laughing at the guy for tripping over a rock in public while hes running for the bus proverbially. I have a book for you - emotional intelligence 2.0. please pick it up at amazon for 10 bucks- so worth it.

There are ways of getting back to them, if you know where they work, school.. i recommend keying there rides, slashing their tires. That laugh they did could be an expensive laugh, one that could cost 200$. by the way, anything below 500$ is a misdeamenor in property damage, anything over that is a felony, so a misdeamonr is just a slap on the wrist case in point. oh and if they work and if you keep on slashing tires (doing it smart at night in the a.m. or well covered up) it could get them fired for coming in late, most likely theyre a holes at the job, so people would be looking for a reason to get there *** the hell out.
 

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Well whatever you think will give you some peace of mind.I wanted to do alot of things to people but i stopped trying.I haven't forgived them in the traditional sense but understood that i wasn't responsible for the nature of my actions..and neither were they.We are conditioned to act a certain way and i could only react with what i had learnt.So i dropped alot of particular experiences and just tried to move on.The past is dead now and my reaction to it will only recreate its existance today.

Everyones different, do what you think you got to do.I personally wouldn't try expect too much.Some may care, others may not.So you got to be prepared for a reaction which could possibly hurt you.
 

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if you can't let it go, then at least tell them how they affected you without getting mad. if you start getting mad and say something offensive to them, they will start feeling justified about what they did to you. they'll have this attitude like "what a *****, I'm glad I did all those things to her."

if you just write to them objectively, they will be able to understand how wrong they were more clearly.
 

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you have to use the power of forgiveness not for there sake but for yours. you cant go through life angry. forgive yourself be kind to yourself... that doesn't mean dont restore justice but an emotional sniper is going to be a bad sniper.
 

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Bad idea, if they really are a-holes then they will just get a huge thrill from knowing that they are still bothering you after all this time. Your goal should be to stop letting them bother you, I know that's very hard but that's what you should be striving for, anything else is just a victory for them.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Thanks for the responses. I'll continue working on letting it go. Sometimes I relapse and have obsessive thoughts and it drives me nuts.
 

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yep i feel like this for a boy i had crush on ..at schooling..he used to speak rude behind my back..i didnt do anything coz i was shy that time...but now m not i want him to meet me n i will bash him off seriously...
cute but dangerous!!
 

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if you can't let it go, then at least tell them how they affected you without getting mad. if you start getting mad and say something offensive to them, they will start feeling justified about what they did to you. they'll have this attitude like "what a *****, I'm glad I did all those things to her."

if you just write to them objectively, they will be able to understand how wrong they were more clearly.
I'll second that!
 

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I really want to email some of the people that hurt me in the past. I want to tell them that it's not true and ask them why. I need some relief. Have you ever done this and did it work out well?
I'm in a similar situation. I found out the work address of one of my old bullies and I've been contemplating what to do with that information. I've walked past his building a couple of times out of morbid curiosity, but I haven't run into him.
 

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The time to confront people (if you're ever going to) is on the spot.

Dredging stuff up from the past is a bad idea.
I have to agree with this, due to a personal experience I had with someone. It didn't really tie anything up for me, but felt more like putting myself back at square one and threw a wrench in my life emotionally, where before things were plugging along okay.
 

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Endless Redemption
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Seriously?

"Life is too short."

I'm out.
 
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