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Perhaps one of the biggest problems in terms of dealing with social anxiety is that I constantly compare myself to other people that I know. In college I fall into thoughts of comparing myself with others who have better grades, are more invovled on campus, have jobs, more friends, party more, ect.
It's almost automatic at times and many times I have to check myself and try to remind myself that I have good grades, and am invovled on campus, and volunteer. I feel like a loser, and inferior to others, which obviously has a bad affect on not only my self-esteem, but also makes me want to crawl further in my shell since I feel like I'm not worth having friends.
Does anyone else have this problem too? If so, how do you try to get out of that comparison trap?
 

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If you compare yourself to others, you will never be good enough <- that's actually what goes through your mind. :(
 

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From one of my favorite poems: "If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself." http://www.desiderata.com/
 

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I do this just about everywhere I go. I think "how would so-and-so act in this situation", or "what is that person doing right that I'm doing wrong to make me such a loser". I think everyone does it to a degree, but my thoughts are totally unhealthy and I forget that it's MY life I'm living, not theirs.
 

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Perhaps one of the biggest problems in terms of dealing with social anxiety is that I constantly compare myself to other people that I know. In college I fall into thoughts of comparing myself with others who have better grades, are more invovled on campus, have jobs, more friends, party more, ect.
It's almost automatic at times and many times I have to check myself and try to remind myself that I have good grades, and am invovled on campus, and volunteer. I feel like a loser, and inferior to others, which obviously has a bad affect on not only my self-esteem, but also makes me want to crawl further in my shell since I feel like I'm not worth having friends.
Does anyone else have this problem too? If so, how do you try to get out of that comparison trap?
I have to keep myself from comparing myself to others. I notice that it has had a bad impact on my self-esteem in the past. I often feel inferior to others if I begin to compare myself.
I am sorry that you feel this way. For what it's worth, you seem to have accomplished more than I have. I haven't even gone to college! I wish I was doing as much as you.
 

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It's difficult to not compare myself to others. Everywhere i go there are constant reminders of how inadequete i am; People with friends, couples, people with careers, good looking people, confident people, happy people, funny people, people who have lives.

Basically things i don't have. Maybe i'm being selfish because there are people in much worse situations like people who can't walk o'r have cancer, but even then i still feel the same.
 

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I do this alllll the time. Especially with a few of my closer friends who are really outgoing (one's a frat boy for god's sakes)

I think that you can use it to your advantage sometimes though, you can get ideas of how to be better and things to say (though you certainly don't want to mimic others).
 

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I do it too. Its just something you need to try and catch as much as possible and remind yourself about the good parts of your life and you.
 

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Here is the interesting part for me... why is it I compare myself to others who are doing better, and that I don't compare myself to those who are doing so much worse.

It seems that it would make me feel better to see how much better I am doing compared to someone else instead of feeling bad because I am not doing as well I would like others.

Do you think this is just human nature?

caflme
 

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I do this all the time when I'm at TAFE. Particularly with girls that are thinner than me. I wish I could realise that at 39kgs I shouldn't be worrying about that.
 
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