try to talk to a class mate here and there. . .haven't done anyy presentations yet . .have a paper to read outloud for my final, still debating on if i am going to show up or not. . ;( its so torchering to do these things! i registered for speech this summer because its a requirement so i dont know how in the worldddddd i am going to do it, but i'll see what happens........here goes nothing!!
I take my classes online avoid group projects and test I am working my way back into the class room but that is just so scary for me. Too many people and the pressure to also do well with grades is overwhelming!
I'm not in college anymore, I graduated back in 2000, but I can tell you what I wish I had done if I could do it all over again from an SA standpoint. I didn't get diagnosed with SA until my last year of college, so I didn't even know what my problem was.
I went to a big university about three hours from family, so for me college was an extremely lonely situation until I settled into the courses for my specific major. Once I did that, I was basically around the same group of people and was able to form a few friendships. Being in a design major, we had to do a lot of group projects and presentations. It was hard at first, but again, since it was the same group of people, I eventually got fairly comfortable with them and it wasn't so bad. And after a while, they almost felt like relatives, I didn't feel so alone anymore, even though I never really had much of a social life.
If I had to do it all over again, the biggest thing I would change in college would be three things:
1) Make sure you are doing some sort of SA therapy regularly. With the main anchor being an anxiety group or a psychologist. Combine that with regular CBT therapy. The support you will get from a group or just being able to talk to a therapist is invaluable. My last year in college I got so depressed I discovered that my school had psychologists you could go talk to every week for free. They saved my life! And the psychologist I got was cool, she was younger and talked to me like a friend, not like a mental case. I would highly suggest you look into that at your school, or pay for one outside if you have to, its worth every penny.
2) Push yourself beyond your comfort zone to join as many activities/organizations as you can. Try several things, find some things your comfortable with. The way I see it is, the short term initial anxiety you will feel from joining some things will be FAR less than 4 or more years of lonliness.
3) Don't compare yourself to other students. Colleges are filled with party animals. Don't let the ease at which they operate make you feel fustrated. Give yourself credit for the gains you make in school. Use yourself as your own baseline for comparison.
I don't know if any of that helps or pertains to your sitaution, but that's what I would have done had I known what I do now about SA. Good luck and keep an open mind about what your capable of doing!
I have found university to be very independant. In pretty much all my classes I sit by myself and rarely talk to anyone. Occasionally in a couple of my past classes I would make the odd acquaintance, but I haven't made any friends through university.
I just go to lectures, tests, and do the assignments...and do everything by myself. In lab work I just sit there working and don't ask many questions due to anxiety and that...I don't really participate in much of the group work.
I was in one group assignment tho where I ended up being the project leader ha. That was cool because I did all the talking...mainly cause the other group members were very quiet and had english as a second language.
But mainly I just sit by myself and all my class mates are loud and talk to each other except me.