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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
The food in my bowl
is old, and more to the point
contains no tuna.

Cat goes in bathroom.
Drags out feminine products.
Guests are horrified.

Tabby attitude.
So aloof and so wily.
Taste like baked chicken.

So you want to play.
Will I claw at dancing string?
Your ankle's closer.

There's no dignity
in being sick - which is why
I don't tell you where.

Seeking solitude
I am locked in the closet.
For once I need you.

Tiny can, dumped in
plastic bowl. Presentation,
one star; service: none.

Am I in your way?
You seem to have it backwards:
this pillow's taken.

Your mouth is moving;
up and down, emitting noise.
I've lost interest.

The dog wags his tail,
seeking approval. See mine?
Different message.

My brain: walnut-sized.
Yours: largest among primates.
Yet, who leaves for work?

My affection is
conditional. Don't stand up;
it's your lap I love.

So you call this thing
your "cat carrier." I call
these my "blades of death."

Toy mice, dancing yarn
meowing sounds. I'm convinced:
you're an idiot.
 

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Take baths with your tongue?
Get high and roll on the floor?
You might be a cat.

Poor smelly cat, smelly cat
Hey, what are they feeding you?
Poor smelly cat, smelly cat
 

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See the lazy cat
Who takes a nap in the road
See the steamroller...

(and if there are animal activists out there, I got this from a friend who adapted it from Garfield)
 
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