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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
so, now i actually have 2 or 3 really good friends.... its awesome, they really like me... but i have developed a problem (i didn't used to have this problem).... whenever they have a big problem, it throws me into shock... like just the other day my best friend came to me in tears, and i had no idea what to do... the only thing i did to help was to keep other people at bay (because they all asked me what was wrong with her and i told them she'd be just fine and just not to bother her)... and another friend of mine whom i was giving a ride home started talking about how when she was younger, her brother and his friends did some pretty bad stuff to her... and i didn't know how to deal with it... she started crying, and all i could do was drive.... i feel like a crummy friend, but i don't know what's gotten into me lately.... what am i supposed to do about this? :no please help....
 

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I have always felt like this too... If the conversation starts getting too deep, I feel helpless and don't know what to do. In those situations, I usually instantly turn the subject to something lighter. Just makes me feel so rude.

Now after almost four months of intesive therapy I notice that I slowly start to be able to talk about little bit deeper emotions... I think this has lots to do with how much you know yourself: do you have to fear that something unknown, bad and shamefull will come to your consciousness without a warning.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
yeah, exactly... but with my close friend, at that time, all i want to do is make them feel better... but i can't... and it makes me feel so powerless... and gets me really worked up, and usually really mad(at myself)... but i have no idea how to make all that go away...
 

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I think you are doing fine and are a good person in general.

As you grow older you will learn to take very direct action in these cases but for now making yourself available in the manner you describe is truly the mark of a gentleman (or lady). A listening ear, and that thing about shooing the busybodies away (they should be shot on sight), help out more than you imagine.
 
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