[forbsey]

Okay we all have SA, but how many of you were bullied as a kid?! My counselor thinks thats what triggered my SA

I was 'okay' socially untill about 13 when I started getting severly bullied at school and ever since then I have found it really difficult meeting new people and have become so withdrawn that I have lost most of the friends I had when I was younger

 

[meggiehamilton]

This whole topic distresses me because I know what it feels like and its not fun so my heart goes out to you. :hug I was always smaller than my classmates plus I was quiet so I guess I was an easy target. I eventually had to start telling some people off. I basically had to force myself to do it. I shocked a few people by my new behavior, but to my surprize some people actually backed off. You dont deserve to be treated like this. You are just as good as everyone else. Don't put up with it.

 

[Noca]

I've been bullied all my life, I guess thats why I'm afraid of people...

I kno what its like, sorry you have to go through this. :hug

 

[Vincenzo]

I wasn't actually bullied at all. I was, however, regarded with a lot of contempt by my classmates

 

[itsmemaggi]

I got the catty, behind-your-back girl bullying in 7th grade. It was not a good year, let me tell you. Since then, it was off and on social problems. Sad, because I was such a happy, friendly, popular child. I went from super-talkative to "she's so quiet!" I told myself that I wouldn't make any enemies in high school, so I kept my mouth shut more and more often, and then it just became habit, and now I can't seem to open it, again.
Woo. Reality strikes.

xoxo
Maggi

 

[millenniumman75]

Count me in this group - I even had this sort of thing done to me at work recently! The pain doesn't change no matter how old you are.

 

[Maz]

I was bullied through year 7 and 8, and just used and walked over during years 9 and 10. It was (what you may call) bullying from one of my teachers that pushed me over the edge.

 

[James of Maine]

I was bullied nonstop from about 1st through 10th grade, and it got especially worse after 4th grade. Merciless harassment, teasing, taunting, and even physical assaults and borderline sexual assaults. The verbal stuff was the most constant, but the physical stuff was traumatic.

(Edit-- I had some second-thoughts and went back and deleted specific descriptions of some incidents... in retrospect I now feel like they were a little too personal and a little too graphic for a public post. I wasn't comfortable leaving it as it was--end of edit).

I won't even go into the humiliations of phys ed class. There, the teachers even encouraged it. I still hate P.E.

Why did they do this to me? Because I was an easy and powerless target. I was shy, timid, awkward, skinny, and weak. They could always get a "funny" reaction out of me, because I was easily embarrassed. I was good entertainment. And I never fought back, and I never told. :sigh

You know, a lot of this stuff I haven't thought about in years, even decades. Some of it, I've actually never told anyone. I just put it away in a box and moved on. But I think it definitely contributed to alot of the issues I have now, including my social anxiety and my depression.

The best I can do is to do whatever I can to prevent my son from being bullied (or becoming a bully) when he enters school.

 

[Lonelyguy]

I had very similar experiences as james. My bullying went on from the day I started school until the day I graduated. It was mostly verbal but I was hit and punched a fair number of times. I was laughed at, humiliated, and embarrassed in front of everyone much to the delight of my bullies. I never fought back, that only seemed to make things worse. Once they know they are breaking you down inside it becomes even more enjoyable to them. Before and after school I had a one hour bus ride each way where the bullying continued, sometimes even worse. I had things thrown at me, I was spit on, kicked, hit, called names, laughed at...the list goes on and on. When I was in about first grade an older kid on my bus thought I looked like a frog for some reason, so he named me "frog". That name haunted me for years. Even after I graduated if I would see one of them in a public place they called me frog. I don't think half the kids on that bus even knew my real name, they only knew me as frog. They would flick their tounges out at me and would even catch flies and throw them at me. I never talked to anyone on the bus...why should I when they were so mean to me? When I was in kindergarden there was a playground bully who liked to punch me just to see me cry. I had girls in school pretend to have crushes on me, they would follow me around like puppy dogs and say cheesy things to me. The only reason was to embarrass me so they could all have a laugh. Junior high school was a nightmare from hell. There was a group of younger jocks who would seek me out and harrass me daily. They said horrible, cruel things to me and would do anything within their power to humiliate me in front of everyone so they could improve their own status. Those were the darkest years for me, it hurts just thinking about it.
There's so many more horrible, horrible things that were done to me over the years only for the amusement of others. I have tried to block out some of the worst things because its just too painful to remember all of that stuff. To this day I still suffer the consequences of the way I was treated for the majority of my childhood. I have very low self esteem and my overall confidence in myself is low. I find it impossible to form intimate relationships with the opposite sex because I am so intimidated by women and feel so undesireable and unwanted. I feel inferior and ugly in everyone's eyes, I don't feel acceptable to anyone because I spent almost half of my life being rejected by everyone. I know I can't spend the rest of my life holding onto the past but this has become the single most difficult obstacle I have ever encountered. My life was basically destroyed...I haven't been able to get it back yet.

 

[murderedpsyche]

I was bullied in grade school because i was introverted and an 'easy target,' but it wasn't just name calling and teasing. Sometimes it was physical. There was this chick named Tammy Kane who was about three or four years older than me and used to beat the crap out of me during and after school all the time. Often after school her brother would join in the fun and I would have to walk home bruised and bloodied and usually missing my jacket or scarf or whatever else they decided to steal. This crap only ended when my family found out where they lived and paid them a visit. During school nothing was done about it because the teacher didn't care. I would complain about being bullied or being beaten up and many times I was told that "there was nothing the school could do about it." I'm glad schools have zero tolerance for this stuff now.

High school wasn't that bad. There was no physical bullying anyway, and I avoided most emotional abuse by hiding in the library during lunch. The blessed books were my refuge.

 

[AstroFan]

I wasn't really bullied on a consistant basis, and there's really only one thing that stands out to me as being fairly serious(mainly because it happened right infront of the teacher which she just ignored). I was ignored more than I was picked on, however, I didn't exactly make an effort, so I take responsibility for that.

 

[Equisgurl]

I was constantly teased by guys in grade school, I think they were jealous of me, as a result I'm afraid to be around men and I just cant let it go because it still hurts.

 

[Melusine]

Reading these posts made me feel for you all.. :hug
I've dealt with things when i was a child, there was always this one girl who apparently hated my guts in school and would always verbally assault me, overall, i think she was jealous of me, she also used me to get the correct answers to tests and such for awhile, i haven't been physically bullied though, but i didn't like my school days at all, thanks to my developing SA and my homelife wasn't that great either with my mother, so i had very low self esteem for awhile.

 

[unnamed]

I remember in the 5th or 6th grade a friend didn't like one of my other friends and said either you don't be friends with him or I won't be friends with you. I told him to piss off and he got a couple of other kids together and tried bullying me. Then I beat the crap out of all of them lol.

 

[murderedpsyche]

I remember in the 5th or 6th grade a friend didn't like one of my other friends and said either you don't be friends with him or I won't be friends with you. I told him to @#%$ off and he got a couple of other kids together and tried bullying me. Then I beat the crap out of all of them lol.

Violence shouldn't be condoned but that's funny! :lol

 

[RedBlueFish]

I was bullied a lot from grade one until I started grade 10, and it got worse starting with grade 5. Grades 5-9 were the worst. At the time the schools and teachers wouldn't do a damn thing, kids would be harrassing me during class right in front of the teacher and the teachers would do nothing. The only time someone did something was 9th grade when one of my teachers talked to all my other teachers because I had this group of girls in 5 of my 6 classes and the teachers would sit me in between them, thinking that my quietness would get the others to behave and separate them from each other. She also went to the dean of the school for me, who called in the girls and said if she heard any more complaints from me about their bullying they'd be expelled.

 

[loganmk]

teased at school

I was glad to read your post. I have been wondering if school time teasing triggered this dreadful anxiety of mine. I am 33 now, but my teasing in higschool was really, really bad. So, bad infect I cried every day then had to drop out. I just could not concentrate. Now, I am a semester away from graduating college-- to help others, social work. Anyhow, I have been curious about a link. I have not been diagnosed but know for a fact I would be...

 

[ShyinNoVa]

I know this was one of the major factors for me. I had already had an emotionally abusive childhood before it happened, but I think this was what put me over the edge. I was severely bullied in 7th grade, and I was so terrified of this girl. I felt like she had turned everyone against me and that everyone in town hated me. I remember I would hide in a corner of my basement all day, cramped behind a chair (in case my mom came down to do laundry) because I was so afraid to go to school. It got to a point where I was afraid to leave the house, and this continued for years.

 

[User]

I experienced a lot of bullying, 8th and 10th grade being the two worst years.

I have a bad case of gynecomastia (male breasts), which led to me being constantly teased, abused and finally made into an outcast at school. Many people made fun of me ranging from strangers to little kids to some of my best friends to even my own Grandmother! I had several people who really crossed the line and don't want to repeat the stories here. Until recently I didn't fully realize the profound affect this condition and the accompanying abuse had on my life. If there's one thing that exacerbated my SA it was this.

I also have kyphosis (spinal disease) and have a noticeable hunchback. I didn't get teased too much on this, but I think it was discussed regularly behind my back (no pun :lol). The few times I did get made fun of, or my condition was pointed out, hurt more than just about anything. This one guy who was a real ***-hole would regularly make fun of how I walked and sat. A teacher whom I really despised once made a scene in front of my class when he tried to straighten my back, realized he couldn't do it, felt along my spine for a curve and then said I should see a doctor (I had already seen quite a few by that time).

I went to an ulra-conservative fundamentalist Christian school for grades 7th through part of 11th grade (I left school that year). The only reason I went to that school is because it was the only private school my parents could afford and they expected it to be free from stuff like bullying and peer pressure. I don't think I know of anyone being more wrong than they were.

I became an outcast because of my political beliefs, my lack of religious beliefs and worst of all my perceived homosexuality. I was very shy around girls and in general an "eccentric" guy, so it was assumed that I was gay even though that wasn't the case. This is fairly dangerous in a school where mass-extermination of homosexuals had jokingly been suggested in class as a solution to the gay issue. I still can't talk about how bad this was.

I was bullied by one teacher (the same who tried to straighten my back), which was worse than just about any of the student teasing.

I hate school and have had quite a bit of trouble getting myself to apply to college. It's so difficult to do anything once you've been bullied badly. I'm going to get surgery sometime in Nov. or Dec. to remove my gynecomastia, but the pain of years of abuse that have led to this operation is almost too much to bear.

 

[BeautifullyDemented]

I was bullied, but nothing to the extent of some people posting. When I was about nine or ten, I hung out with a girl who was a couple years older then me, she used to call me names constantly, she once told me that she'd always be better then me, and I'd never be anything (Kind of stuck with me). She used to make me do rather uncomfortable things in her house when her mother wasn't home, or sleeping, too, which is how I think I became a lesbian (Hah). Of course, compared to the constant beating some of you've gotten, its nothing.

I feel ya, though. :hug