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I'm trying to decide which is the worse fate of social phobiacs: to be always lonely because you don't have friends at all, or to be always lonely because you have only toxic friends and you don't know how to make new ones. Anyway I am in the latter camp. I've kind of known this for a long time, but it just struck me recently that no one I associate with is in any way trustworthy, and every one of them will take advantage of my trust if I give them any.

I read somewhere that people can lie so frequently and automatically that they start to believe their own lies, their brains don't know the difference anymore. I think this is the case for at least one of my best friends. He will say the most obvious lies and swear up and down he is telling the truth. Like if I ask him if he'sgoing to be somewhere, he will say yes, then we he never shows up and I ask where he was he swears he has no idea what I mean. Most people who have to deal with him probably think he is on drugs all day. But really he is just sick and broken.

others are sociopathic and know they are lying, but they just don't care who they hurt or abuse as long as they come out Scot free. One of these guys was drunk once and said one of the only truthful statements I ever heard from him, he said "I would f*** over anyone aside from my close family if it got me a little bit further in life." of course, he doesn't normally talk like that, most of the time he acts like a stand up guy, talks about "loyalty" and other principles he doesn't have and only uses as a tool to manipulate people. I could give a long list of scumbag things this guy has done over the years... Tries to steal all of his friends' women, steals money from people in their sleep, even despite his regard for family he regularly manipulates his brother into doing things illegal or immoral for him.

these are the kinds of guys who seem really charming when you first meet them and don't know them well, but eventually the truth comes out so they don't retain many friends for long... Aside from social retards like me who can't make new friends. They have f'ed over so many other people through the years that no one else has time for them. Well they're all engaged to be married soon so I guess it doesn't matter because I won't be friends with them much longer anyway. Then my social circle will be a rotating cast of other strange people with no lives that go to Meetups.
 

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We don't need people to survive. We only need ourselves.
 

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I know exactally where you're coming from, as i am also surrounded by them. They're just, werid and not "fully" there.
They talk to you like they know you, like "oh yeah bro thats fine, of course, this that, safe" but in reality they don't give one single **** - but if you was to draw them up on that, they'd defend the side and say they do, but if a situation occured where they were forced to demonstrate this you wouldn't see an ounce of loyalty.
**** um.

I'm also at the point where i think i'm just guna be a loner for however long because being around toxic people is just not good for you're health and leaves you feeling worse after you've been around them.
 

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I ditched my semi-GF from years ago, who I had re-met this summer. She got very toxic, and when I'm trying to do positive things socially for once, the last thing I need is a negative mean voice, like my old enemies, brainwashing me with BS again

So I ditched her, she was my only daily contact via texting.
 
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