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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm not bragging about anything at all... I am very muscular and have a very nice looking face, but I have SA. Everywhere I go, people look at me, talk to me, and want to interact with me... But they think I'm being rude to them because of my SA. I feel like I am always under a microscope, there are so many people who come up to me and talk to me or flirt with me, and it's TERRIFYING to me. I was "ugly" when I was younger, and then I grew into my body and I get compliments on a regular basis. I am happy with how I look, but that doesn't mean my SA is gone, it's only gotten worse. I guess I just wanted to make this topic to see if anyone else has heard of people like this, or if you are one yourself. Your SA is so bad that even when someone is complimenting you, you can't accept it? Everyone thinks if you look "attractive" that you don't have any problems, but that's just the thing, appearance is just a visual thing... Sorry for the stupid topic
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Pics or it didn't happen :D
lol well i know you're just being funny, but that's another thing, i constantly am afraid that people dont actually want to get to know me or be friends with me, they just want to be my friend to "show me off" and i KNOW this sounds so pitiful and im sorry... but it's happened to me before where i lost all my friends after a period of time and they truly didn't care for me, and a lot of people i think just want to have sex but i am terrified of having sex too lol... i am a mess, but luckily i think once i open my mouth the illusion of attractiveness is gone and then people just hate me like normal so there;s my silver lining :D
 

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Can understand what you mean and how it would be really uncomfortable with SA, particularly as you say since you know people are looking at you regularly. Are you taking any therapy for your SA?
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Can understand what you mean and how it would be really uncomfortable with SA, particularly as you say since you know people are looking at you regularly. Are you taking any therapy for your SA?
yes i was in therapy for a little while and have a doctors' appointment coming up and maybe will be prescribed something, i took anti depressants for about a year and it made me feel worse, so i don't know... but i did see a therapist for a little while, it just makes me feel so strange and out of place to have people talk to me and expect something out of me and then when i start talking they realize im just a nobody and i let everyone down pretty much all the time (at least i feel like i do... maybe i don't, at least i like to pretend like i'm coping well socially sometimes)
 

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Not that I get girl everywhere I go, but I have always manage to get some girls interest by me often enough in my life. And yeah like you said, they think I'm rude or something. I had girls asking me out and I just stand there froze emotionless since I didn't know what to say.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Not that I get girl everywhere I go, but I have always manage to get some girls interest by me often enough in my life. And yeah like you said, they think I'm rude or something. I had girls asking me out and I just stand there froze emotionless since I didn't know what to say.
yes and it's even worse when it's somebody who is really attractive because then you feel like the world is ending, it's really difficult and then they think you're just a weirdo or that you don't like them or something
 

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yeah, i get what u mean... im a little bit above average and i always felt as if people thought i was stuck up when i really didnt know what to say... but now that my sa has gotten better and i can talk to people and ive learned to like the attention
 

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Not that I get girl everywhere I go, but I have always manage to get some girls interest by me often enough in my life. And yeah like you said, they think I'm rude or something. I had girls asking me out and I just stand there froze emotionless since I didn't know what to say.
Yes I'd love to?
 

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yeah, i get what u mean... im a little bit above average and i always felt as if people thought i was stuck up when i really didnt know what to say... but now that my sa has gotten better and i can talk to people i like the attention
How did it get better, meds or exposure?
 

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I don't get that a lot in public. But when I was in the mental hospital women there said I was very cute and stuff. So I don't know what to think after being discharged for the hospital and females ignoring me in public.
 

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I know what you mean. I am pretty attractive, but was also an ugly duckling.

People generally think I'm super rude or emotionless when I don't pick up on their cues that they're interested in me.
 

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I wouldn't call myself "attractive", but deffo 'downgrade', or try to hide how I look, ect, baggy clothes, sunglasses, hoodies. Keeping hidden, so no one see's that sort of thing, is what I do best.
 

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How did it get better, meds or exposure?
exposure but i not like were u go and force urself to talk to so many strangers in a day or anything like that... i just forced myself to start living life like i didnt have anxiety... like if i had an errand to run i wouldnt ask anybody to go with me and help me like i had been or anything i just forced myself to do it myself... and eventually the physical symptoms like shaking and trembling voice went away and then shortly after that i stopped getting the anxious thoughts and here i am now... what really helped me was this

thought-> feeling-> behavior

its the flow of anxiety and every time i started to feel anxious i just tried to trace things back to the thought and find a logical fallacy within the thought to discredit my anxious feeling and behaviors
 

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im glad u posted this cuz thats something i wouldnt of been able to do. id say im attractive lol and it does give SA some extra challenges. like when people ask me on a friday what im doing that night theyre always realllyyy disapointed w my answer cuz they think im guna have these awesome plans, i like my plans but for my age group its not what everyones doing. people ask me wheres the party at? lol idk. theyre like y arent u going to a club or party & i dont know what to sayy cuz i just prefer not to go and i get looked at like im an alien 0_o. & when guys hit on me i cringeee. idk what to sayy lol i come off like a snob and a b itch but thats not it at all. like this one guy the other day drove up beside me at a red light & he was pretty cute & he looked at me checking me out and was trying to say watsupp & i just kinda waved and looked at my phone then sat at the longest red light of my life. & people do expect attractive people to magically have no problems, its sooo weird. theyy forget that ur a person & just think ur this specimen to look at. thanks again for posting makes me feel like im not alonee!
 

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What sucks about being good looking with SA is that you prolly can't get a gf/bf in your league looks wise. I am attractive i mean i get hot girls asking me out and giving me their numbers a lot, but my anxiety just kills it. I hate this because all the hot girls have more options and will not likely give someone like me a chance. I've tried in the past and failed miserably it sucks.
 

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I actually think I unknowlingly have been overweight to avoid this problem. I'm pretty good looking when I'm in shape and there seems to be an expectation of you being full of confidence when you are that way.

I got myself back into shape at university and I just found my anxiety getting a lot worse because of how differently people were treating me and how forward strangers were with me. Whether the positives of being healthy outweighed the negatives I'm not sure but I did put on weight again lol
 
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